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Birthday parties
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 566280" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>I just "have" to share a story..a story that moved me to tears just a few years ago. difficult child#2 is an Aspie who is really kinda confusing. When he was sixteen he received a beautiful formal invitation to a birthday celebration for a young girl who was in his one Special Education class at the high school. The invitation was engraved, included a reply card, dual envelopes...the whole smear. It was at the one and only "fine" hotel in our town.</p><p></p><p>husband had just taken him to buy his first grownup dress pants, shoes, coat from a major store an hour away. I almost croaked when I saw the bill. husband said "he needs to 'know' how to present himself profperly". Lo and behold the invitation came (looking like invitations that I received in the 1950's and 1960's when I lived an above average life). I showed him how to fill in the card indicating he would be there and explained to him how hotels and country clubs needed to know how many people were coming for their food and service prep.</p><p></p><p>I dropped him off at the hotel. He looked really handsome and walked with the confidence one has when they know they are prepared and looking good, lol. He was to call me when he was ready for pickup or..I would be outside waiting when the party was over. He was dropped off at home before the official time of party end. I, of course, did not comment. I greeted him with a hug, told him how handsome he looked (and he did..he's a good looking kid) and we all went to bed.</p><p></p><p>The next day I asked about the party. He was the ONLY person who showed up. They had hired a DJ. They had a full buffet of wonderful food. The entire party was the girl, her parents, her grandparents who were paying for the lovely Sweet Sixteen party........and.......difficult child#2. He told me "Mama the men playing the music kept asking me what songs I liked so I would dance with her. I did dance every dance but I'm not really a dancer, Mama. I ate so much because there were not other people to eat all the food...and I didn't want to eat that much." "Her Uncle drove me home and on the way he thanked me for being her friend. He even got out of his car and shook my hand and gave me a hug. He told me "you have been a wonderful companion for my neice and you are welcome in my home or her family home anytime..thank you."</p><p></p><p>I'm moved as I share this because it caused me more than one sleepness night. You can not make a difficult child a easy child. You can pay countless money. You just can't change it. My difficult child#2 was confused but he was proud. I had taught him how to dance and which fork to use and what to say. He was the Aspie man of the hour. The girl??? She had a sad night that she probably will never forget. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 566280, member: 35"] I just "have" to share a story..a story that moved me to tears just a few years ago. difficult child#2 is an Aspie who is really kinda confusing. When he was sixteen he received a beautiful formal invitation to a birthday celebration for a young girl who was in his one Special Education class at the high school. The invitation was engraved, included a reply card, dual envelopes...the whole smear. It was at the one and only "fine" hotel in our town. husband had just taken him to buy his first grownup dress pants, shoes, coat from a major store an hour away. I almost croaked when I saw the bill. husband said "he needs to 'know' how to present himself profperly". Lo and behold the invitation came (looking like invitations that I received in the 1950's and 1960's when I lived an above average life). I showed him how to fill in the card indicating he would be there and explained to him how hotels and country clubs needed to know how many people were coming for their food and service prep. I dropped him off at the hotel. He looked really handsome and walked with the confidence one has when they know they are prepared and looking good, lol. He was to call me when he was ready for pickup or..I would be outside waiting when the party was over. He was dropped off at home before the official time of party end. I, of course, did not comment. I greeted him with a hug, told him how handsome he looked (and he did..he's a good looking kid) and we all went to bed. The next day I asked about the party. He was the ONLY person who showed up. They had hired a DJ. They had a full buffet of wonderful food. The entire party was the girl, her parents, her grandparents who were paying for the lovely Sweet Sixteen party........and.......difficult child#2. He told me "Mama the men playing the music kept asking me what songs I liked so I would dance with her. I did dance every dance but I'm not really a dancer, Mama. I ate so much because there were not other people to eat all the food...and I didn't want to eat that much." "Her Uncle drove me home and on the way he thanked me for being her friend. He even got out of his car and shook my hand and gave me a hug. He told me "you have been a wonderful companion for my neice and you are welcome in my home or her family home anytime..thank you." I'm moved as I share this because it caused me more than one sleepness night. You can not make a difficult child a easy child. You can pay countless money. You just can't change it. My difficult child#2 was confused but he was proud. I had taught him how to dance and which fork to use and what to say. He was the Aspie man of the hour. The girl??? She had a sad night that she probably will never forget. DDD [/QUOTE]
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