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bit confused on what to do about this one......
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<blockquote data-quote="svengandhi" data-source="post: 377404" data-attributes="member: 3493"><p>Cheerleading may not be the best activity for a kid who has social anxiety, in my humble opinion. My son is also entering middle school on Tuesday. I am in the county directly to the west of yours. My son has issues as well, though they do not seem as pronounced as your daughter's. I have told my son that he has to choose one activity after school. He has selected Drama Club but the stage crew portion, not the out there in your face acting part (which my daughter did and loved). He is creative and likes to build things like Legos, so he thinks stage crew might be good for him. He is also planning to attend the afterschool sped HW club. If your school has such a program, you might encourage her to participate. I am hoping that getting to do his HW with sped teachers will reduce his anxiety about it and lessen my struggles when I get home from work at 7ish (H works from home but doesn't "do" HW with the kids and never has).</p><p></p><p>Anyway, if I were you (and I have been in your position), I would be working towards an IEP before she tanks. Start by sending a letter (certified) to Pupil Personnel (or whoever your SD web site says to send one to) requesting a re-evaluation and a CSE. I would also immediately ask for a team meeting of all of her teachers to be held within the first two weeks of school. We did this with difficult child every year and found that getting to talk to the teachers early on made a huge difference. We let them know that we understood that difficult child is a challenging child and that we would be supportive of their efforts BUT that we would not allow him to be marginalized or punished for his disability. We couldn't always protect him from poor choices but we accomplished a lot. ALL parents are entitled to team meetings with their teachers, not just IEP parents.</p><p></p><p>As for the 504 v. IEP issue, I don't get why she has to tank academically to get an IEP. My difficult child is entering 11th grade and has had an IEP since he was 2. Although he has an IQ of 137 (considered a low estimate due to his refusal to fully cooperate), his grades are not what you would expect. Despite that, he is in almost entirely honors and accelerated level courses. His diagnosis is school based anxiety disorder and he has an ED classification. I have never had the school try to declassify him. Of course, I learned my lesson when I declassified oldest boy going into middle school and put him on a 504. He was back on an IEP before the first quarter was over.</p><p></p><p>I have seen too many parents given the runaround by SD's. The ones in your county are notorious for their efforts to deny FAPE. My county is a little bit better. Based on what you say about your daughter, it is my opinion that she should have an IEP on an ED classification, like my son. Many parents (myself included at first) fight the ED classification due to perceived stigma. Now I don't care. His classification has allowed me to have him placed in higher level classes, where he is happy getting B's and C's, rather than having him kept in regular level classes where his ODD ness would result in him failing because he would be bored out of his skull. He would be entitled to an aide but we decided it would be more detrimental than helpful to him (that was a full CSE decision - the SD wanted the aide, we did not). He has consultant teacher but last year refused to speak to the poor woman. When his friends asked who she was, he told them she was a cousin of mine who worked at the school (I've never met the lady!).</p><p></p><p>I have helped several friends of mine with their kids' issues. I have helped people get their children classified and/or have their placements changed or their classification status changed. It can be done. The key is to research and document. See if your library has a book that helps break down the subscores on the testing. I made a chart of my kids' results and was able to point out that even though his score was very superior overall, there were clear deficits in areas that supported the arguments I was making. I used the same technique to get one friend's son a diagnosis of ADD/Learning Disability (LD) and to get a dyslexia diagnosis for another of my children. Subscribe to the Reed Martin site (they may have the link on the sped forum) Wrightslaw.com, It is a bounty of information. If you don't belong to your SD's SEPTA, join and see what advice they can give you.</p><p></p><p>It's very hard to go up against the SDs. I am a litigator by profession and there have been times when I have felt intimidated by the SD. Once, I faced down their attorney across the table over difficult child's placement for science in 8th grade. The principal didn't want him in honors and I told the lawyer I'd sue because meeting with him was the exhaustion of my administrative remedies (the superintendent had set up this meeting). They blinked and difficult child wound up with an A+ in the course and a 98 on the Regents. Bottom line is that YOU know your child best. The SD WANTS to intimidate you. Try not to let them.</p><p></p><p>Good luck. I hope that I have inspired you to continue your good fight and to not let them talk you down. difficult child does NOT have to tank before she gets help. My main argument was that even thinking of allowing a child with anxiety and self-esteem issues to tank before helping them was obviously going to make the problem worse.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="svengandhi, post: 377404, member: 3493"] Cheerleading may not be the best activity for a kid who has social anxiety, in my humble opinion. My son is also entering middle school on Tuesday. I am in the county directly to the west of yours. My son has issues as well, though they do not seem as pronounced as your daughter's. I have told my son that he has to choose one activity after school. He has selected Drama Club but the stage crew portion, not the out there in your face acting part (which my daughter did and loved). He is creative and likes to build things like Legos, so he thinks stage crew might be good for him. He is also planning to attend the afterschool sped HW club. If your school has such a program, you might encourage her to participate. I am hoping that getting to do his HW with sped teachers will reduce his anxiety about it and lessen my struggles when I get home from work at 7ish (H works from home but doesn't "do" HW with the kids and never has). Anyway, if I were you (and I have been in your position), I would be working towards an IEP before she tanks. Start by sending a letter (certified) to Pupil Personnel (or whoever your SD web site says to send one to) requesting a re-evaluation and a CSE. I would also immediately ask for a team meeting of all of her teachers to be held within the first two weeks of school. We did this with difficult child every year and found that getting to talk to the teachers early on made a huge difference. We let them know that we understood that difficult child is a challenging child and that we would be supportive of their efforts BUT that we would not allow him to be marginalized or punished for his disability. We couldn't always protect him from poor choices but we accomplished a lot. ALL parents are entitled to team meetings with their teachers, not just IEP parents. As for the 504 v. IEP issue, I don't get why she has to tank academically to get an IEP. My difficult child is entering 11th grade and has had an IEP since he was 2. Although he has an IQ of 137 (considered a low estimate due to his refusal to fully cooperate), his grades are not what you would expect. Despite that, he is in almost entirely honors and accelerated level courses. His diagnosis is school based anxiety disorder and he has an ED classification. I have never had the school try to declassify him. Of course, I learned my lesson when I declassified oldest boy going into middle school and put him on a 504. He was back on an IEP before the first quarter was over. I have seen too many parents given the runaround by SD's. The ones in your county are notorious for their efforts to deny FAPE. My county is a little bit better. Based on what you say about your daughter, it is my opinion that she should have an IEP on an ED classification, like my son. Many parents (myself included at first) fight the ED classification due to perceived stigma. Now I don't care. His classification has allowed me to have him placed in higher level classes, where he is happy getting B's and C's, rather than having him kept in regular level classes where his ODD ness would result in him failing because he would be bored out of his skull. He would be entitled to an aide but we decided it would be more detrimental than helpful to him (that was a full CSE decision - the SD wanted the aide, we did not). He has consultant teacher but last year refused to speak to the poor woman. When his friends asked who she was, he told them she was a cousin of mine who worked at the school (I've never met the lady!). I have helped several friends of mine with their kids' issues. I have helped people get their children classified and/or have their placements changed or their classification status changed. It can be done. The key is to research and document. See if your library has a book that helps break down the subscores on the testing. I made a chart of my kids' results and was able to point out that even though his score was very superior overall, there were clear deficits in areas that supported the arguments I was making. I used the same technique to get one friend's son a diagnosis of ADD/Learning Disability (LD) and to get a dyslexia diagnosis for another of my children. Subscribe to the Reed Martin site (they may have the link on the sped forum) Wrightslaw.com, It is a bounty of information. If you don't belong to your SD's SEPTA, join and see what advice they can give you. It's very hard to go up against the SDs. I am a litigator by profession and there have been times when I have felt intimidated by the SD. Once, I faced down their attorney across the table over difficult child's placement for science in 8th grade. The principal didn't want him in honors and I told the lawyer I'd sue because meeting with him was the exhaustion of my administrative remedies (the superintendent had set up this meeting). They blinked and difficult child wound up with an A+ in the course and a 98 on the Regents. Bottom line is that YOU know your child best. The SD WANTS to intimidate you. Try not to let them. Good luck. I hope that I have inspired you to continue your good fight and to not let them talk you down. difficult child does NOT have to tank before she gets help. My main argument was that even thinking of allowing a child with anxiety and self-esteem issues to tank before helping them was obviously going to make the problem worse. [/QUOTE]
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