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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 561650" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>These are all excellent suggestions, Ktllc. But I fear they would not work with J. It is kind of hard to explain... but he's just not receptive and child-like as you'd expect in these kind of situations. Instead of listening and absorbing information, he loudly proclaims that he knows exactly what the answer is already - he knows why he does things, he knows what he feels, he doesn't want to listen to any explanations of this or have any sense that he has anything to learn. He is like that with a lot of things - he knows it all already and there's nothing you can tell him. And, I know, he's still only five... Crazy. </p><p></p><p>And I wouldn't find it hard to do it at all, actually. I'd welcome the chance to talk about it with him, and have often talked about his birth mother to him (thereby kind of creating the problem, I suspect) and encouraged him to explore his feelings. But of course he doesn't really know what he feels... how could he? It must feel so strange to have the only mother you have ever known telling you that she is not "really" his mother (I don't put it like this of course) and that he grew in another lady's tummy. When he was smaller he used to say he wished he had grown in my tummy, but he doesn't say that any more...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 561650, member: 11227"] These are all excellent suggestions, Ktllc. But I fear they would not work with J. It is kind of hard to explain... but he's just not receptive and child-like as you'd expect in these kind of situations. Instead of listening and absorbing information, he loudly proclaims that he knows exactly what the answer is already - he knows why he does things, he knows what he feels, he doesn't want to listen to any explanations of this or have any sense that he has anything to learn. He is like that with a lot of things - he knows it all already and there's nothing you can tell him. And, I know, he's still only five... Crazy. And I wouldn't find it hard to do it at all, actually. I'd welcome the chance to talk about it with him, and have often talked about his birth mother to him (thereby kind of creating the problem, I suspect) and encouraged him to explore his feelings. But of course he doesn't really know what he feels... how could he? It must feel so strange to have the only mother you have ever known telling you that she is not "really" his mother (I don't put it like this of course) and that he grew in another lady's tummy. When he was smaller he used to say he wished he had grown in my tummy, but he doesn't say that any more... [/QUOTE]
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