Books in the 649.64 adult non-fiction section

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Andy, May 2, 2008.

  1. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    I finally got a chance to go to the library to borrow the Explosive Child book. Our library was suppose to have a copy but it was indicated as "LOST" so I have requested it from the other libraries in the system.

    In the mean time, I have found that there looks like interesting reading in 649.64 books (adult non-fiction). I have requested several other books that our library did not have. (1 2 3 Magic, a book about quirky kid or (can't remember), and one or two others). therapist recommended 1 2 3 Magic and the little I read sounds like something I did when my kids were very little - My mom thought I was teaching my daughter sign language - Nope, just trying to get her to behave.

    I did take out "The Manipulative Child", "The Angry Child", and "Kid Cooperation - How to Stop Yelling, Nagging, and Pleading and Get Kids to Cooperate". Has anyone read these? What do you think of these?

    Right now I am ignoring pleads from difficult child to come to his room. Most parents have difficulty keeping their children in bed at bedtime, mine refuses to come out if they need anything - would rather have mom "serve" them. I am working on getting difficult child to come find me - no whining and demanding that mom come to him. Earlier tonight - much to my surprise - he actually did come out to me after I told him if he wanted something he needs to come find me. He came and asked me politely to go to his room with him to discuss something. (Hard to believe he is 11 years old - still stuck in the toddler world of "Mommy! Mommy come here!" ) I am starting with "The Manipulative Child" book. :)
     
  2. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Hmm, haven't ready those but they sound like good bets.

    I'd say stick to your guns.

    Has he been tested Learning Disability (LD) or anything?
     
  3. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    I sure could use the Kid Cooperation book. Lately all 3 of mine have deaf ears and summer hasn't even begun.
     
  4. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Another good author is Sandy Spurgeon McDaniel. She's got several books out on positive parenting methods that really seem to work well -- even for kids with mental and emotional issues.
     
  5. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    I am glad you found a help section.

    I have read several books over Dude's lifetime. The biggest waste to me was 1-2-3 magic. I won't recommend it because I tried some of the methods with Dude -and I say ONE, TWO.........THREE and then on three he's supposed to know me saying "One, and TWO were warnings."

    I think "NO" is a better more direct thing to teach a child. My reasons for NOT ever recommending it? Dude was 3 years old, he found a fork, he popped off the safety cover - and was digging around and my mother in law (who recommended the book) was sitting there yelling DUDE ONE......(slap my head) no - a fork in the socket is a HUGE NOOOOOOOOOO. But she proceeded to say "TWO." and Dude looked back with a devilish grin and by the time she had said 2 - I was across the floor and knocked it fork out of his hand.

    I asked her - WHAT IF HE WAS RUNNING INTO TRAFFIC - are you going to yell "ONE, TWO, THREE? OH sorry - you chose not to listen you are dead?" and she said well for THOSE times you yell NO. And I said THen what is the sense of yelling out ONE, TWO, THREE?" When she couldn't give me a logical response to a good question - I decided that 1,2,3 was not for me.

    It teaches (IMVHO) a young child that you get three chances to do what you want to do before the parent hits the magic THREE word - and then it's like I said -HOW would they differentiate between (one, two three - for putting back a box of cereal) and (one, two, three - don't run into the road?)

    As for me and my house? No thank you. I don't think it's a good thing to teach any child - let a lone a difficult child who gets an inch and takes a mile.

    If you can get a copy - try 'How to talk so your kids will listen and how to LISTEN so your kids will talk." it has work book pages and a week to week study focus. I wish I had gotten that book when I was pregnant with my son - I really thought I knew how to talk to kids - and well - let's say I'm still learning.

    Oh and FYI (not that it matters) I was in a store yesterday and heard a child misbehaving. ANd the young mother started with a long drawn out - ONE........TWO....and I said to myself OKAY THAT's THREE.....and the mother went - FOUR......and I finally looked up and said - "Question? At what number do your children become obedient and listen?" and she said (serious) "Well I try to give them extra chances before I give punishments." and I stared at her and said "So saying IF MOmmy says NO - or you'll get a punishment doesn't work you just keep going until you hit on a number that you don't have to give out a punishment?" and she said "Well I'm shopping and I didn't want to have to stop." and I said "Uhhhhh huh......sounds like she's got you trained pretty well - good luck with that." and she was polite and smiled - but it just sounded lame to me.

    Happy reading.
    Hugs
     
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Oh, STAR!!! Thank the stars I am NOT the only parent who's child thought 123 Magic was a huge joke (and this by age 3!!!). AND he taught the others to go ahead and count the other numbers just as soon as they could speak!

    123 Magic MIGHT work on pcs. I found it useless.

    We REALLY had great luck with the Love and Logic books. You can learn more about Love and Logic by going to their website. I found even the teacher stuff to be helpful.

    They did NOT have a bookfor special needs kids when I discovered love and logic. We used the regular books, and THEY WORKED, better than anything else. They were not magic, but our house was much calmer, and we were all happier.

    I especially like the audiobooks they have. One about helicopters and drill sargeants talks about different parenting styles and how they help/don't help kids, and how kids ahve different styles and need different parenting than the parent might instinctively use. I am not explaining it well here, but it is a really good, REALISTIC program.

    I also went to a conference given by the older Dr. Charles Fay (he raised the younger Dr. Charles Fay on love and logic - and now the son teaches it). The seminar was really really helpful to me.

    Gotta run, hope the books help you.

    susie
     
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