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Brainstorming needed (long)
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 221623" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>This was a huge thing for difficult child 3. His masking behavours show that he is making an effort. He may still be confused/overwhelmed but knows he shouldn't be or doesn't need to be. He is recognizing how he should behave and is doing his best to live up to that. It will take practice.</p><p></p><p>It may be time to start introducing him to maps before going out. Talk through the steps and write down each one. At each step along the way, he can follow his list and know that you are still on the right path. Try to get him to relax between each transition on the map. O.K. we made it to the train station. What are we looking for now? Yep, this is the correct train, you read your plans well, let's enjoy the scenery and get school work done.</p><p></p><p>I think by the time he met classmates, he had already become so overwhelmed with the new environment that he had shutdown somewhat. He knew these people but couldn't face where from even though he was at a school event. (I did that last Saturday; came face to face with a doctor from the facility I work in. We were in a different town away from work and it took me a few minutes to figure out where I knew him from. I don't see him very often at work.)</p><p></p><p>Taking control of the elevator is another sign of shutting down. If he can put everyone/everything in its place, then the environment will make sense and feel safe. If he is doing something, then he can keep control of his feelings. A job keeps him too busy to fall too deep into the anxiety.</p><p></p><p>I think it is great he can get any work done on the train even when it is a way for him to focus on something. The movements of the train would make it hard for me to write and think. I think his ability/interest in watching the scenery is also a step forward. As he gets further from home, his anxiety increases and if he is enjoying scenery, then he is trying to control that anxiety. The longer he can relax and enjoy the scenery, the longer it will take for the anxiety to start to grow.</p><p></p><p>Maybe if he starts using his own "map" with a list of steps he can learn to relax between transitions. O.K., we are now on the train, we can enjoy this ride until we have to get off. A few minutes before we get off, we will review our "map" to prepare for the next transition.</p><p></p><p>He really is doing a great job! You are also doing great in recognizing the needs that are still there.</p><p></p><p>I hope this makes some sort of sense.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 221623, member: 5096"] This was a huge thing for difficult child 3. His masking behavours show that he is making an effort. He may still be confused/overwhelmed but knows he shouldn't be or doesn't need to be. He is recognizing how he should behave and is doing his best to live up to that. It will take practice. It may be time to start introducing him to maps before going out. Talk through the steps and write down each one. At each step along the way, he can follow his list and know that you are still on the right path. Try to get him to relax between each transition on the map. O.K. we made it to the train station. What are we looking for now? Yep, this is the correct train, you read your plans well, let's enjoy the scenery and get school work done. I think by the time he met classmates, he had already become so overwhelmed with the new environment that he had shutdown somewhat. He knew these people but couldn't face where from even though he was at a school event. (I did that last Saturday; came face to face with a doctor from the facility I work in. We were in a different town away from work and it took me a few minutes to figure out where I knew him from. I don't see him very often at work.) Taking control of the elevator is another sign of shutting down. If he can put everyone/everything in its place, then the environment will make sense and feel safe. If he is doing something, then he can keep control of his feelings. A job keeps him too busy to fall too deep into the anxiety. I think it is great he can get any work done on the train even when it is a way for him to focus on something. The movements of the train would make it hard for me to write and think. I think his ability/interest in watching the scenery is also a step forward. As he gets further from home, his anxiety increases and if he is enjoying scenery, then he is trying to control that anxiety. The longer he can relax and enjoy the scenery, the longer it will take for the anxiety to start to grow. Maybe if he starts using his own "map" with a list of steps he can learn to relax between transitions. O.K., we are now on the train, we can enjoy this ride until we have to get off. A few minutes before we get off, we will review our "map" to prepare for the next transition. He really is doing a great job! You are also doing great in recognizing the needs that are still there. I hope this makes some sort of sense. [/QUOTE]
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