called patient advocate

[Jena]

difficult child's the same. no change at all. yet i came to learn that her lithium was increased yet again with-o my knowledge.

i called patient advocate who on my behalf contacted the program administrator and head of it.

i was told that it is illegal for him to be changing medications with-o my knowledge at this point.

the issue will be addressed tmrw. at a mtg. with-difficult child's therapist and the head of the program.

i was in contact with-the oregon program i spoke of which is where difficult child was going to go in the beginning. i told them what was going on and they were shocked. they said they'd take her. so if i cant' get any satisfaction from hospital tmrw concerning difficult child, medications, her current state etc. husband is going to borrow from his life insurance so i can get her to oregon next. we are going to be entering 2 mos. of no eating now.

 

[smallworld]

Jen, I'm so sorry. I hope you can get some satisfaction one way or another. difficult child needs help now. It can't go on any longer. Hugs.

 

[Bunny]

I'm sorry to hear that things are not going well. I can't believe that the hospital keeps changing her medications without contacting your first. I would be very angry, too, if I were in your position. I hope that the hospital in Oregon can help you.

Pam

 

[Jena]

thanks guys yea it's all a bit much. i actually grabbed a glass of wine to calm myself it was either that or a xanax. i had to bring myself down. yes i am now self medicating. unreal. than i got in truck with-husband and his kids to go pumpkin picking thinking i could handle it.

that didn't work. his older daughter with whom i have no relationship with and is difficult on me than texted husband and wanted to go so off to ex's house we went. i sat in driveway for twenty min. waiting as his older daughter than came to truck complaining about phone no charger, etc. with all her endless drama, his ex on porch making gesture to make husband laugh and he did. the kids in back talking about xmas. and i felt totally lost in it all, complete overload with the situation. so i asked him to bring me home. told little kids i loved them yet i couldnt' do it today yet i'd help them carve when they go thome. husband wasn't happy yet i do not care at this point. i know my limitations. me picking out pumpkins while difficult child is in hospital like this just didnt' feel right. they have their life at home with husband's ex wife it isnt' like their with me everyday and i'm not taknig care of them.

 

[Bunny]

yes i am now self medicating. unreal. than i got in truck with-husband and his kids to go pumpkin picking thinking i could handle it.

I thiknk that we have all done that. I know I did it several times last week. You have to know your limits and today pumpkin picking was just not something you were able to do. You took care of yourself. I hope the rest of the day went better.

Pam

 

[Jena]

Pam

yes we all do have those days. i came home and was pro active, sat down and made notes for tmrw's meeting so i'm prepared and not emotional. i often need to do that with stressful situations so i dont' lose my way and can best advocate for her and get the outcome that best suits difficult child.

i do not want to transfer difficult child to oregon, it's alot of money, it's yet another transition for her. yet a clear and concise plan has to be devised. they know their losing the battle with her. also i wasnt' at my best day i met with the dr. i was tired, worn down, zero sleep.now i'm sleeping again, rested and able to think clearly.

stand downs' with a difficult child who isnt' eating isnt' the way to go to me. there are medical components here. if she was admitted to a psychiatric unit in all honesty i'd have to say stand down all you want and need to. yet that wasn't the case she is in a edu unit for not eating. the main goal shoudl be refeeding not battling wits between a 50 year old man and an eleven year old child. that is simply silly.

here's hoping tmrw goes well. or else we gotta call insurance co. get check book flight and head out to oregon. i gotta get this kid eating and stable. if we were in week 3 or 4 of non eating i may have time to play yet we're too far down the road now. so this jerky dr will have to do a show down with someone else's child.

now if difficult child suddenly begins to eat tonight awesome! great! yay! nurse told me we should see a break today. that hasnt' happened yet. i know my kid and her anxiety is high when she's in familiar setting. 50 mg. barely covered it at home. 50 mg. isnt' giong to even begin addressing her anxiety issues in another state alone with-zero coping skills. he thinks she's battling yet she isnt' she just gave up now.. she told nurse what's the point. there is no point to any of it anymore.

that to me sounds like it's the beginning of possible suicidal ideation. told nurse make sure all bags, sharp objects etc. are out of the room. she said i already did.

 

[klmno]

Jen- check on insurance issues first- there might have been a maximum stay they will be pay for or it might be limitted how often you can do this in a certain period of time. I know you have to do what you have to do and the kids' welfare comes first, but I'd hate to see all that money spent going out there if she can't be covered and therefore, kept in their program.

 

[Jena]

klmno ahead of you lol and thanks for thinking of the logistical stuff that over look during these i'm going psycho times. i called the advocate for insurance and already gave a heads up i might be pulling her and to prepare to battle again with next place.

in my heart i am praying that these ppl do the right thing and i do nto have to withstand a 7 hour flight and being away from easy child for a month.