Can we have summer vacation all year long?

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by flutterbee, Jul 13, 2007.

  1. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    I can definitely tell school is out. difficult child is almost easy child. She hasn't been sick in 4 weeks. No meltdowns, no screaming fests, very little stomping...although that is her favorite thing to do so she can't give that one up entirely.

    When we take the crippling anxiety away, I can see the other issues much more clearly. Mainly, the executive function stuff. The rest of the year the anxiety completely overshadows everything else.

    I can't always tell, though, how much is related to the executive function disorders and how much is just her dependency on me. For example, she could tie her shoes at the babysitter's for a year before she could tie them at home.

    She was making cookies the other night and it called for 1/2 cup of butter flavored shortening. I have the sticks of shortening that are individually wrapped and sealed in a plastic tub. She made a big deal out of not knowing what to do about it (rather loudly and in that shrill tone that makes my head want to come off). I told her to take the foil seal off the top. She did and then made a big deal over not being able to cut the stick because it's in the tub and she doesn't know how to get it out (you have to envision a highly intelligent and even more dramatic child and all the body language...not just the hands...she puts her whole body into it). I walked over, picked up the tub and turned it upside down. Voila, the foil wrapped stick of shortening fell right out. She got this rather bemused look on her face and I said, "Now, don't you feel silly.", at which point she laughed and said I was mean. (She's lived with me 12 years and she's just now figuring that out?! :wink: )

    So, how can one be able to follow the directions and put all the ingredients together, preheat the oven, and bake cookies but be unable to get a stick of shortening out of the tub? I'm pretty sure had I not been in the room, she would have figured it out. I mean, the kid taught herself how to knit for crying out loud. I'm very confident that the tub of shortening would not have outsmarted her.
     
  2. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

    Trust me, this story you'll be telling to the grandkids. lmao
     
  3. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh my what a funny story-I love your sense of humor! :rofl: Glad to hear she is doing well with summer here!
     
  4. busywend

    busywend Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I have had the same thoughts - what was it about me that made my difficult child so dependent and incapable when I was around. I did not coddle her. I did not wait on her. Even thought she never had dinner brought to her she continued to ask for that for years. Just in the last year she has stopped. But, she still asks for me to bring her things now and then. I am SURE she does not do this at dad's - but I can not figure out why the difference.

    It is something in the dynamic of the relationship. That is why I am convinced that had I not moved my difficult child to her dad's for a year to break that dynamic a bit - things would not be as good as they are today.
     
  5. Sheila

    Sheila Moderator

    :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

    So true.

    difficult child has done similar things. The simplest thing will sometimes throw him for a loop. It messes with my head. lol

    Re: school. I know exactly what you mean. I hate what the demands of school does to him anxiety-wise.
     
  6. Marguerite

    Marguerite Active Member

    Boy, does this sound like my kids, especially easy child 2/difficult child 2. She's allegedly genius material, yet the same sort of problems have her upset and wailing. I put it down to anxiety and insecurity. And SHE'S 20!

    Marg

    by the way, you cannot have summer all year long - it's not fair. We have to take turns, and I'm not putting up with a year-long winter!
     
  7. ML

    ML Guest

    Amen to that!

    Excect my son was one of the two reading groups out of five that received summer homework package. He is second going into third. I decided that we needed the break more than the homework. It's his anxiety more than his trouble with reading that is the problem anyway. He *can* read fine but boy, his short attention span makes homework a mindfield in our home.

    That brings me to another subject. difficult child was very upset that only two groups got homework. I thought it was rather insensitive to the staff to present this to the entire class. DS was pretty upset about it. He doesn't like to be singled out like that.

    How hard is it to remove homework from a 504? lol. J/k sort of. I would just want a pass once in a while when the anxiety and drama of it all go over the top.

    I'm not looking forward to "Fall" which starts in August here.
     
  8. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    Never a dull moment in this house. :wink:

    Michele - I have no homework written into difficult child's IEP. As I explained it to the school district, she is anxiety ridden before school, during school and at night thinking about going to school the next day. She needs some down-time with that. So, schoolwork during school hours only.
     
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