Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Can't wait for summer
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 198392" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>Has he been tested for a learning disorder? The teacher says he knows the stuff during class participation but then the test and homework and he does terrible. I wonder if he is having difficulty reading and comprehending the questions or writing the answers? If he is having trouble with reading or writing, that would explain his behavior to a point. He is trying to get everyone's attention away from his school work. He feels frustrated because he can not do the homework and tests but when asked he can answer correctly. When my difficult child feels "stupid" (I would never tell any child they are stupid but difficult child will say he is when he can't do the homework, he will misbehave to prove to himself that he is bad, that he can not follow the rules of learning. He will say, "See, I am stupid, I can not do anything right." Makes it easier for parents and teachers to accept less if the child can make us believe they are incapable of listening and following rules.</p><p> </p><p>Your difficult child knows not to hurt a human - he does not see that destroying property should be a problem because it does not hurt anyone. To him, it is a stress reliever. Maybe finding some way for him to get his anger and stress out? Punching bag, squeeze balls, run around the outside of the house, scream into your pillow, ect.?</p><p> </p><p>Major is old enough to recognize that he has energy that he needs to burn somehow. You can talk to him during a calm time, "Major, I notice that when you get frustrated, you destroy property. Everyone gets frustrated from time to time but destroying property is not a good way to defuse. Can I help you make a list of ideas?" Take a poster board with a variety of colored markers and have Major write the ideas. Post these in his room and next time he is sent there ask that he choose which one he can do and you will talk after he calms down.</p><p> </p><p>How is his relationship with big brother? Does the brother spend time with him? Can you encourage the older brother to set aside time to spend with Major? </p><p> </p><p>You are doing great in keeping with the entire and full consequence regardless of how sweet and polite he becomes before the end of the discipline. He can not be allowed to manipulate his punishment.</p><p> </p><p>You may want to check out the book "The Manipulative Child" to see if those techniques would work in your family.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 198392, member: 5096"] Has he been tested for a learning disorder? The teacher says he knows the stuff during class participation but then the test and homework and he does terrible. I wonder if he is having difficulty reading and comprehending the questions or writing the answers? If he is having trouble with reading or writing, that would explain his behavior to a point. He is trying to get everyone's attention away from his school work. He feels frustrated because he can not do the homework and tests but when asked he can answer correctly. When my difficult child feels "stupid" (I would never tell any child they are stupid but difficult child will say he is when he can't do the homework, he will misbehave to prove to himself that he is bad, that he can not follow the rules of learning. He will say, "See, I am stupid, I can not do anything right." Makes it easier for parents and teachers to accept less if the child can make us believe they are incapable of listening and following rules. Your difficult child knows not to hurt a human - he does not see that destroying property should be a problem because it does not hurt anyone. To him, it is a stress reliever. Maybe finding some way for him to get his anger and stress out? Punching bag, squeeze balls, run around the outside of the house, scream into your pillow, ect.? Major is old enough to recognize that he has energy that he needs to burn somehow. You can talk to him during a calm time, "Major, I notice that when you get frustrated, you destroy property. Everyone gets frustrated from time to time but destroying property is not a good way to defuse. Can I help you make a list of ideas?" Take a poster board with a variety of colored markers and have Major write the ideas. Post these in his room and next time he is sent there ask that he choose which one he can do and you will talk after he calms down. How is his relationship with big brother? Does the brother spend time with him? Can you encourage the older brother to set aside time to spend with Major? You are doing great in keeping with the entire and full consequence regardless of how sweet and polite he becomes before the end of the discipline. He can not be allowed to manipulate his punishment. You may want to check out the book "The Manipulative Child" to see if those techniques would work in your family. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Can't wait for summer
Top