Cheech made it to 27 ...

Marcie Mac

Just Plain Ole Tired
There were times I didn't think he would make it to 18, or 19, or 20.... Would he ever finish school, will he ever get a job, will he ever move out (guess two out of three ain't bad given he is still a difficult child) LOL

It was hard adjusting my expectations - there would never be a graduation ceremony, never a prom but I remember I was so over the moon when he went out a got a GED - that for him was a major accomplishment at that time in his life

Jobs..working for others in the 9 to 5 so far has not been in the cards, and I don't think that would ever come to pass. Too hard to overcome his arrest record. He is just too "difficult child'ish" for that to happen. Anyone he has ever worked for, after the first day, knows nothing and he by osmosis knows everything.

Working for a contractor, he learned how to tile effortlessly. Offer by me to send him to school for a contractors license, forget it. Someone gave him a car with a blown engine, he took the whole dang thing apart, put in a new engine, AND changed it from an automatic to a stick - spending months running from the garage to his computer to look up info. Offer by me to send him to automotive school, forget it.
No incentive to do those things for a living - once he has conquored somthing, he is in a been there done that mode, and its all over.

But the computer, thats another story. He has taught himself to build them from scratch, and repair them. People are comming to the house every day with a computer or laptop to either fix and upgrade. He has rearched the web, and has taught himself to do the network stuff. He and his brother, in a first time joint venture, built SO and I each a new computer for Christmas. He has even mentioned going to school to get his certifications. He absolutely loves the challanges

He is finally hitting his stride I think. Still has his drinking problem, still a pot head, and omg, he can stop with the Tatoo's already, still gets tickets for one thing or another. But that is his stuff to deal with now. Doesn't have a car, or a license, or a bank account. If he needs to buy something for his work, he hands over money and asks that I order it for him (such a far cry of just TAKING my credit card or cash out of my wallet without asking). We put him on the cell phone plan, again, SO was dubious, but this time he asks how much he owes and pays it, even will ask if he is ok on minutes.

It looks like Mr. Toad's Wildride is going a lot slower these days. There is a light at the end of the tunnel (albiet still flickering from time to time) for those who are sure they are not going to make it another day with your difficult child.

My mission for today is try and not panic when he goes out to celebrate tonight on this St Paddy's day ROFLMBO

Marcie
 

everywoman

Well-Known Member
Thanks Marcie---at least I know there is some light at the end of this tunnel---difficult child will be 23 in May---and hopefully by 27 he will at least be earning some money :)
 

Star*

call 911........call 911
HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHEECH!

(actually I think YOU should be the one having the drink Marcie) lol

Congratulations for surviving - and thanks for the words of encouragement!

Hands Marcie LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL AWARD!!!!

(I remember when he tore your dining room floor up - wasn't that around Christmas? And now he's doing tile? Awesome!)
 

Marcie Mac

Just Plain Ole Tired
Star, that was Christmas two years ago LOL, and it is still in the same state (although I do have a brand new countertop due to his lack of impulse control in dismantling the tile one that was on there). He hasent tiled it yet as I have a crack in the foundation (could have done nicely without knowing that had he left it alone) and its gonna be an arm and a leg I don't have yet to get someone in to fix it)

But he has since tiled the wall behind the stove and also tiled the bathroom floor. SO is just blown away by his ability to just "eye" cuts without making a pattern first, and getting a perfect fit first time every time.

Marcie
 

slsh

member since 1999
Aw, Marcie - just the title of the thread made me grin... and then cringe. I cannot believe it - 27?????? Dagnabit, why are our kids getting so old???? We're certainly not!!! :rofl:

I remember when he decided he was going to be a (SEAL was it?) and live in a really nice condo in San Diego, on the water if I recall correctly. And the tats... goodness. Are they a full body suit yet?

Our kids do have so many gifts - I'm really glad old Cheech (chuckling here) has found things that engage and reward him. I guess our kids just really need to live outside the box.... waaaaay outside, LOL.

Wish him a very happy B-day. And I think you should have a green beer or 3 too!!!
 

DammitJanet

Well-Known Member
Gosh. this makes me grin! I hadnt remembered that he was actually born on St. Paddy's day. I guess you should have known you were going to be in for it! And now I will never be able to hear that famous song without thinking of you two.

I do know what you mean though about them hitting their strides eventually and we just have to accept them as they are. Gee...how many of our kids are hitting 27 this year? Danny, Jamie, is Rob? I think Ant would be and maybe Tylerfans Dtr.
 

Suz

(the future) MRS. GERE
Ah....the first of our circle of boys to turn 27. Congratulations, Cheech!!! He's always had a special place in my heart, Marcie. He might be a difficult child but what has always saved him is his charm.....and YOUR sense of humor.

Hugs,
Suz
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
AWESOME! Happy birthday Cheech!

What's great about computer tech...........is that it is always constantly changing so there is always something new to learn. So he should never really get that been there done that thing.
 

LittleDudesMom

Well-Known Member
[insert huge grin]!!!!! Happy Belated birthday to Cheech.

Hopefully that magic pixie dust of yours will blow across the board.......

Sharon
 

Marcie Mac

Just Plain Ole Tired
Figured enough time had gone by I could post something positive and odds were in my favor on a board jinx LOL Yeah, he is a real charmer Suz - his english father says he could convince you to buy shy*e on a stick, and you would come away overjoyed that you made the purchase.

We havent seen him since last night - there were a ton of people here all gathering to go off to the Irish pub in celebration who had big discounts on beer and Irish food. He had his green Irish shirt on with a very rude saying, and a green top hat with sparkles on it and was well on his way to wasted. I am just praying he didn't get in a fight but the urge to check the county jail website has become a thing of the past LOL

There are still days where I just cannot stand another minute of him, but they are a way lot less than what they were, and he is someone who will forever be a work in progress. Seems like when I recognized I could not "fix" him, and stepped out of his spotlight of difficult child'ness and pretty much let the chips fall where they may, I was able to find again all of his good qualities that were hidden by his horrid behavior in the past.

Marcie
 

Fran

Former desparate mom
Marci, happy birthday for you. You have survived 27yrs.
I think the moment realize you can not make your difficult child be successful or a non difficult child, the pressure is off. I can not take responsibility for his failure or his success. I can only offer my advice if asked for (well ok, sometimes when he doesn't ask). I feel more at peace.
Your difficult child has provided all of us who remember huge amount of smiles at his antics and your incredible devotion to him. I'll never forget you high heels over your head as you land in the bushes in defense of your difficult child. His devotion to you is pretty special too.
Hope his future is full of success in his own difficult child style. Happy birthday.
 

Suz

(the future) MRS. GERE
I'll never forget you high heels over your head as you land in the bushes in defense of your difficult child. I'll never forget you high heels over your head as you land in the bushes in defense of your difficult child.

:rofl: OMG :rofl: Loved that story :rofl:

Oh.............and the night Cheech posted on the board and got busted. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Suz
 

DDD

Well-Known Member
I, too, can't believe that so many years have passed "on the edge" with our boys. Somehow it made me feel a little better reading on AOL today an article entitled something like "Child Men". It said there is a whole generation of males who just have not been able to transition into standard adulthood. There is some comfort in numbers!

The baby steps continue as middle age looms. I definitely understand the anxiety of St. Patty's and other celebrations. Sigh!
on the other hand I have learned to be grateful that easy child/difficult child only gets drunk a couple of times a week and doesn't drive if he is going to get smashed. Geez! I'm thankful, like you, for each day that does not include a crisis and a slow (very slow) pattern of improvement is better than no improvement. Here's to an improved year as he moves on toward 28. Hugs. DDD
 

Marcie Mac

Just Plain Ole Tired
Sooo many Cheech stories its a wonder that my heart and my mind didn't give out or get lost. I really think the only thing that saved me , and him, was my sense of humor when it came to the absurd, and it didn't hurt that I used to be a difficult child so don't even go there with me boy.

I wish now I had kept the posts of every bonehead move he has made over the years. His first and last posting on the board had me laughing -If you would have seen his face when the phone started ringing with calls nationwide by the "faceless and unknowing according to him) within sheer minutes giving me a heads up - pricesless. He came in the other day and found me reading the board and said "are you still on there" - said no, only reading now - and he said how is Suz and Fran doing LOL

Marcie
 

Suz

(the future) MRS. GERE
and he said how is Suz and Fran doing

lol!

Thank goodness for some laughs during our misery, that's for sure. :Grouphug:

I wish now I had kept the posts of every bonehead move he has made over the years

I am grateful that time has dimmed and softened much of my memory of those awful times with Rob. :clubbing:

Suz
 
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