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Comment at the swimming hole.
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 373062" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>If you tell the school, protect the source. ALWAYS.</p><p></p><p>Cultivate your spies and your sources. You need them. </p><p></p><p>For us, the best spies were the non-teaching adults who came into contact with the kids for various reasons. In Australia we still have scripture classes in state schools. They are optional but I have no problem with my kids taking scripture class. The alternative is secular boredom. They are beginning to trial secular ethics classes as an alternative.</p><p></p><p>But the scripture teacher was in a position to observe and reported to me some very nasty things she saw happening to difficult child 3. The class teacher was generally till in the room but marking papers or doing other bookwork. Scripture teacher said she must have known about the kids poking difficult child 3 with sharp objects, but did nothing. </p><p></p><p>Other valuable sources of information I found were other kids, especially kids in a different class or grade. Generally tey were only able to report two different type of things:</p><p></p><p>1) exceptional problems, such as a bad fight in the playground; or</p><p></p><p>2) incidences of teacher bullying, such as difficult child 3 being grabbed and dragged by his clothing, by a teacher who I thought was a friend of mine. I reported what I had been told, refused to name my source (I didn't even say it was a kid) and of course I was told it didn't happen. But I had independent confirmation that it did happen. However, by reporting it when I was told, it made it clear to the school that they couldn't sneeze without me passing them a hankie. </p><p></p><p>A point in support of the school (devil's advocate here) - the canteen lady sees a different aspect of the child, than the aides whose contact with Wee is likely to be more intense. Nothing excuses gossip or negative attitude, however.</p><p></p><p>I do the devil's advocate stuff because it's important to plan ahead for the school's most likely defence. If you plan ahead, you have your responses planned ahead. If you were a lawyer about to go into court to defend a client, you would also prepare the prosecution case (as far as you could) so you would be ready to counter it. Always look at all sides of the argument.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 373062, member: 1991"] If you tell the school, protect the source. ALWAYS. Cultivate your spies and your sources. You need them. For us, the best spies were the non-teaching adults who came into contact with the kids for various reasons. In Australia we still have scripture classes in state schools. They are optional but I have no problem with my kids taking scripture class. The alternative is secular boredom. They are beginning to trial secular ethics classes as an alternative. But the scripture teacher was in a position to observe and reported to me some very nasty things she saw happening to difficult child 3. The class teacher was generally till in the room but marking papers or doing other bookwork. Scripture teacher said she must have known about the kids poking difficult child 3 with sharp objects, but did nothing. Other valuable sources of information I found were other kids, especially kids in a different class or grade. Generally tey were only able to report two different type of things: 1) exceptional problems, such as a bad fight in the playground; or 2) incidences of teacher bullying, such as difficult child 3 being grabbed and dragged by his clothing, by a teacher who I thought was a friend of mine. I reported what I had been told, refused to name my source (I didn't even say it was a kid) and of course I was told it didn't happen. But I had independent confirmation that it did happen. However, by reporting it when I was told, it made it clear to the school that they couldn't sneeze without me passing them a hankie. A point in support of the school (devil's advocate here) - the canteen lady sees a different aspect of the child, than the aides whose contact with Wee is likely to be more intense. Nothing excuses gossip or negative attitude, however. I do the devil's advocate stuff because it's important to plan ahead for the school's most likely defence. If you plan ahead, you have your responses planned ahead. If you were a lawyer about to go into court to defend a client, you would also prepare the prosecution case (as far as you could) so you would be ready to counter it. Always look at all sides of the argument. Marg [/QUOTE]
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