Companion to Witz' - you might be a man thread

[Star*]

Summer Classes for Men Due to the Complexity and Difficulty Level Of Their Contents, Class Sizes Will Be Limited to 8 Participants Maximum.

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  [*]Class 1: How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
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  [*]Class 2: The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
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  [*]Class 3: Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? --- Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
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  [*]Class 4: Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor --- Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturday at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
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  [*]Class 5: After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
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  [*]Class 6: Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM.
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  [*]Class 7: Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum . Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
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  [*]Class 8: Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health. Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
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  [*]Class 9: Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials. Tuesday at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.
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  [*]Class 10: Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday noon, 2 hours.
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  [*]Class 11: Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing . Tuesday at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.
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  [*]Class 12: How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours ! Beginning at 7:00 PM.
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  [*]Class 13: How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
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  [*]Class 14: The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesday at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

 

[gcvmom]

Oooh! Oooh! When does registration begin?! If husband doesn't pass the class can I kick his ?

 

[WhymeMom?]

Too many offerings---it will just confuse them.......Better advertising---Join us for the special appearance of "Miss Makita"! Get your picture taken with the tool queen!!!! Once they are all in the room lock the door and start the instruction......

 

[wakeupcall]

My difficult child is a male.....can I sign him up???

 

[gcvmom]

WMM, that approach might work for my husband, but only if it's a sports-related hook to get him in the room

 

[Abbey]

WHERE ARE THE MEETINGS? Do I need to buy a plane ticket for husband?