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<blockquote data-quote="totoro" data-source="post: 85403" data-attributes="member: 3155"><p>You know when I was her age, I had people act like... if they gave me what they thought was a stable environment. (it wasn't) that I should be grateful and be OK. But i had been through SO much... Mother commiting suicide and Father in and out of prison, both abandoning me plus many other things... Not to mention the neurological things that were going on that were just simply out of my control... </p><p></p><p>I went to a really good junior high and high school... but not as far as dealing with me, they tried. My stepdad adopted dad gave up on me, He felt like well, you have a roof over your head, what is there to be angry about???</p><p>My Father was kind of the same, he gave me a lot of things... (no therapy though or diagnosis) they all thought I should just be happy. because the "problem" was removed... even though no-one knew what the problem was...</p><p></p><p>My depression manifested itself in some pretty horrible ways, but none that most people who were not well versed in depression and mania would have seen... my damage was so deep that a stable home and possibly medications etc. would most likley not have worked at that point in time. It took me a long time to work out the things I went through in my life... of course I am still dealing with my Mental Illness.</p><p></p><p>All I am saying is that even though you are trying your best and giving her everything you can... sometimes that will never be enough... </p><p></p><p>I honestly wasn't given that, but I don't think I would have taken it at the point she is at either... it is very hard to really put yourself in the mindset of someone else... honestly why would she enjoy all of the misery if she wasn't sick??? If she is enjoying it as far as you can tell, then that is a symptom of her illness and she obviously needs help... No-one ever thought I was suicidal... everyone thought everthing I did was for attention and because I was a brat. </p><p>Now when everyone looks back it is so clear and no-one can believe it all... even when I was locked up at 16 for a couple of days, I said what they wanted, they let me out... All for attention... </p><p>I was on my own by 17 and so lost... but I made it. </p><p></p><p>I do know you are trying hard, but I don't know if she is really doing these things because she wants to... and if she feels that at all it can send her further downward. The best thing they could have done for me when my Stepdad/adopted dad beat me up was not find my real Father, but send me to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) or a Hospital... but no-one knew how bad I was or believed...</p><p></p><p>Try to pull yourself out of the picture and keep and open mind when it comes to this child... I have to do that with my own child... why would a 6yo in a wonderful home want to die??? Because she is sick!!!</p><p></p><p>Hang in there.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="totoro, post: 85403, member: 3155"] You know when I was her age, I had people act like... if they gave me what they thought was a stable environment. (it wasn't) that I should be grateful and be OK. But i had been through SO much... Mother commiting suicide and Father in and out of prison, both abandoning me plus many other things... Not to mention the neurological things that were going on that were just simply out of my control... I went to a really good junior high and high school... but not as far as dealing with me, they tried. My stepdad adopted dad gave up on me, He felt like well, you have a roof over your head, what is there to be angry about??? My Father was kind of the same, he gave me a lot of things... (no therapy though or diagnosis) they all thought I should just be happy. because the "problem" was removed... even though no-one knew what the problem was... My depression manifested itself in some pretty horrible ways, but none that most people who were not well versed in depression and mania would have seen... my damage was so deep that a stable home and possibly medications etc. would most likley not have worked at that point in time. It took me a long time to work out the things I went through in my life... of course I am still dealing with my Mental Illness. All I am saying is that even though you are trying your best and giving her everything you can... sometimes that will never be enough... I honestly wasn't given that, but I don't think I would have taken it at the point she is at either... it is very hard to really put yourself in the mindset of someone else... honestly why would she enjoy all of the misery if she wasn't sick??? If she is enjoying it as far as you can tell, then that is a symptom of her illness and she obviously needs help... No-one ever thought I was suicidal... everyone thought everthing I did was for attention and because I was a brat. Now when everyone looks back it is so clear and no-one can believe it all... even when I was locked up at 16 for a couple of days, I said what they wanted, they let me out... All for attention... I was on my own by 17 and so lost... but I made it. I do know you are trying hard, but I don't know if she is really doing these things because she wants to... and if she feels that at all it can send her further downward. The best thing they could have done for me when my Stepdad/adopted dad beat me up was not find my real Father, but send me to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) or a Hospital... but no-one knew how bad I was or believed... Try to pull yourself out of the picture and keep and open mind when it comes to this child... I have to do that with my own child... why would a 6yo in a wonderful home want to die??? Because she is sick!!! Hang in there. [/QUOTE]
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