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<blockquote data-quote="Bunny" data-source="post: 515883"><p>Honestly, I think that sometimes they "can't" connect the dots because they don't want. Because having to connect those dots means that they might actually have to work towards something and I think that alot of these kids just think that these are things they are owed. I get this with difficult child, too. He has allowance money burning a hole in his pocket and he wants me to take him to the toy store. husband and I tell him that we don't think he has behaved well enough to earn a trip to the toy store, which then turns into a tanturm, and the urns it around by saying that I'm not taking him because I don't love him. Not true. He was give a detailed list of what was expected if he wanted to be taken to the toy store, and none of it was hard. It was all stuff he could easily do if he chose to, but he doesn't want to do it. He just wants me to take him, no matter how good or bad he behaves. </p><p></p><p>It's already starting with driving. difficult child will be 13 soon and he keeps talking about how when he's 16 he's going to learn how to drive. I keep telling him that just because he turns 16 does not mean that I have to allow him to get a leaners permit. He needs to prove that he has enough control of his emotions and his anger to be trusted with something that could be turned into a deadly weapon. He says I don't him to learn to drive because I don't love home, which is what I think he says when he knows that I'm right, but won't admit it. He just doesn't get it. I'm starting to wonder if he ever will.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Bunny, post: 515883"] Honestly, I think that sometimes they "can't" connect the dots because they don't want. Because having to connect those dots means that they might actually have to work towards something and I think that alot of these kids just think that these are things they are owed. I get this with difficult child, too. He has allowance money burning a hole in his pocket and he wants me to take him to the toy store. husband and I tell him that we don't think he has behaved well enough to earn a trip to the toy store, which then turns into a tanturm, and the urns it around by saying that I'm not taking him because I don't love him. Not true. He was give a detailed list of what was expected if he wanted to be taken to the toy store, and none of it was hard. It was all stuff he could easily do if he chose to, but he doesn't want to do it. He just wants me to take him, no matter how good or bad he behaves. It's already starting with driving. difficult child will be 13 soon and he keeps talking about how when he's 16 he's going to learn how to drive. I keep telling him that just because he turns 16 does not mean that I have to allow him to get a leaners permit. He needs to prove that he has enough control of his emotions and his anger to be trusted with something that could be turned into a deadly weapon. He says I don't him to learn to drive because I don't love home, which is what I think he says when he knows that I'm right, but won't admit it. He just doesn't get it. I'm starting to wonder if he ever will. [/QUOTE]
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