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Contagious Factor/Siblings/Depression Risks
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 257408"><p>Our son and family had great difficulties with- all of this.</p><p>I did observe our son really blossom once he was out of the home.</p><p>In retrospect, I wish there had been many more opportunities for separation.</p><p>I WISH I could have figured out healthy and happy ways for him to visit relatives for example. </p><p>Or for difficult child to have gone to a boarding school or summer school to give easy child a breather. (However, with adoption in the picture...those abandonment concerns are always there).</p><p>By the time we figured some of these things out, my kids were older and husband and I were burned out in a major way. I use to walk around saying "what happens after one is PAST burn out." That is where I was.</p><p>This is why I like to encourage folks on this board to do a few things when and where possible...</p><p>1. Get rest and nurture yourself</p><p>2. Get help...respite...relief...separation time</p><p>3. Figure out a way to find some quiet time for yourself, your other children and for your spouse. </p><p>It's a tall order and really will require the help of others. husband and I rarely had that help. On the occassions that we did...I think of these people as major blessings in my life and am very grateful.</p><p>I think that if you can work in some relief time, in the end the resentment will not be as powerful. MY easy child does have "issues" with reference to his sister, but I have also noticed that he has a very kind spirit. (Both of my children do).</p><p>I do wonder if our son would not be such a wise young man at such a young age had he not seen all that he has seen.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 257408"] Our son and family had great difficulties with- all of this. I did observe our son really blossom once he was out of the home. In retrospect, I wish there had been many more opportunities for separation. I WISH I could have figured out healthy and happy ways for him to visit relatives for example. Or for difficult child to have gone to a boarding school or summer school to give easy child a breather. (However, with adoption in the picture...those abandonment concerns are always there). By the time we figured some of these things out, my kids were older and husband and I were burned out in a major way. I use to walk around saying "what happens after one is PAST burn out." That is where I was. This is why I like to encourage folks on this board to do a few things when and where possible... 1. Get rest and nurture yourself 2. Get help...respite...relief...separation time 3. Figure out a way to find some quiet time for yourself, your other children and for your spouse. It's a tall order and really will require the help of others. husband and I rarely had that help. On the occassions that we did...I think of these people as major blessings in my life and am very grateful. I think that if you can work in some relief time, in the end the resentment will not be as powerful. MY easy child does have "issues" with reference to his sister, but I have also noticed that he has a very kind spirit. (Both of my children do). I do wonder if our son would not be such a wise young man at such a young age had he not seen all that he has seen. [/QUOTE]
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