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Parent Emeritus
Contagious Factor/Siblings/Depression Risks
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<blockquote data-quote="jbrain" data-source="post: 257446" data-attributes="member: 3450"><p>I had a similar experience to Crazy. My youngest dtr's problems are directly related to growing up with her older sister who was not nice to her most of the time. Also, I was so focused on difficult child 1 and her problems that I didn't make the time easy child/difficult child 2 needed from me. She felt she had to be perfect and stuff all her feelings and she was dealing with the physical and emotional abuse from her sister too. Even my older son told me he felt all alone after his dad died and he knew he couldn't have any problems because I had enough on my hands with his sister.</p><p></p><p>I regret that I seemed to totally focus on fixing my difficult child--it is hard for me to understand that mindset anymore now that she has been gone from my house for nearly 3 years and she didn't really make any progress until she was gone. I spent so much time and energy and money on trying to fix her when I think what she really needed was to figure out she would have to fix herself.</p><p></p><p>Thanks,</p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jbrain, post: 257446, member: 3450"] I had a similar experience to Crazy. My youngest dtr's problems are directly related to growing up with her older sister who was not nice to her most of the time. Also, I was so focused on difficult child 1 and her problems that I didn't make the time easy child/difficult child 2 needed from me. She felt she had to be perfect and stuff all her feelings and she was dealing with the physical and emotional abuse from her sister too. Even my older son told me he felt all alone after his dad died and he knew he couldn't have any problems because I had enough on my hands with his sister. I regret that I seemed to totally focus on fixing my difficult child--it is hard for me to understand that mindset anymore now that she has been gone from my house for nearly 3 years and she didn't really make any progress until she was gone. I spent so much time and energy and money on trying to fix her when I think what she really needed was to figure out she would have to fix herself. Thanks, Jane [/QUOTE]
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