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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 374981" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>There have been Department of Juvenile Justice staff in this state get busted for some pretty bad things- providing drugs, having sex with wards, giving a ward the key to the door, etc.....and we're talking about Department of Juvenile Justice facilities that have younger teens in them who are classified as lower risk. (Believe it or not, difficult child is not classified as violent although I can see why in a way since he's never actually severely physically hurt anyone, compared to those juveniles who have shot someone or actually carried out a malicious wounding.)</p><p></p><p>I'm regrouping and am updating on me in the WC instead of in General. I will say though that I have cut that final cord with my mother. I just got so tired of her living in her own delusion and replied to her last email of doom and gloom about her "friends" and her house selling when it's all she has (is it any wonder-- she never cared about anything except her stuff and money and won't listen to any advice or join forces and she's always been this way)....anyway, here was the bulk of my response, after showing my due pity for her situation:</p><p></p><p><em><strong>difficult child</strong> got recommitted to the state juvenile justice system- that is incarceration, not social services taking him away from home. He will be there longer this time than last time so that basicly blows his teenage years and a lot of possibility for getting things turned around. No matter who you want to blame for it, it would take some intensive therapy and rehabilitation to get him on the right track now and incarceration doesn't provide that. Social services does but due to the previous actions of you and <strong>Bro</strong>, I can't get <strong>difficult child</strong> help or transitional services thru them. I hope you remember that the next time you are "in a panic because you love him so much".</em></p><p></p><p>My mother could have been the person that instigated the phrase "talk is cheap". When difficult child was out for that first short period, she was emailing me telling me to tell him that she really hoped she could see him soon. Now I ask you, how much sense does that make when she said we couldn't come there, so we had no choice but to stay here and he had to be in school so couldn't travel to her (where we weren't welcome anyway), and she was selling her house to move 2 states away with no plans to visit us? I ignored that at first then after receiving a few like that, I responded with "Exactly HOW do you plan on seeing him?" and she replied that she didn't know but wanted him to know she loved him. No, she wants to "look good" and never own up to her contribution in all the koi- just as it's been all my life.</p><p></p><p>But what burns me most- she says her bro (the one who raped me after she brought him to our home to live when he was released from a criminally insane ward of a psychiatric hospital upon condition that he receive intensive outpatient therapy and the entire family would be involved in therapy) was the way he was because their mother never held him accountable and I have been the cause of difficult child's problem. OK, well even if I bought that I caused every one of difficult child's problems, if I messed him up that bad then wouldn't we still need therapy and him need something pretty intensive to get it turned around? Nope- just like she never made it a condition for her bro in order for him to live with us, and Lord knows, she never allowed anyone in the family to pursue therapy as long as they lived under her roof. That was considered a punishment she threatened. So her bro spirals downward until I am raped by him. difficult child- she "couldn't stand him going to DSS"- mind you, I was trying to get him into a therapeutic environment. Nope- she had to get my bro involved who has always wanted custody. Ma. PHD in psychiatric. How many generations and lives can she ruin? I asked her about 2 months ago if she didn't think her bro was mentally ill- she said nope, he was just messed up by their mother. And unfortunately, I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that many in the Department of Juvenile Justice system still look at things like this too. Their definition of mentally ill or needing MH treatment usually only covers the completely delusional or insane. OMG the regrets I have.</p><p></p><p>Maybe that seems like re-hashing but it's the stuff that gets stirred up when this toxic woman starts her passive agressive koi. And I will bet the last dollars in my pocket that she will react to my last email by calling her sister and whining about me blaming her for all my problems and her sister will buy it. This would be the sister who caught their bro in a room with her 5 yo daughter naked when he was supposed to be babysitting but never reported him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 374981, member: 3699"] There have been Department of Juvenile Justice staff in this state get busted for some pretty bad things- providing drugs, having sex with wards, giving a ward the key to the door, etc.....and we're talking about Department of Juvenile Justice facilities that have younger teens in them who are classified as lower risk. (Believe it or not, difficult child is not classified as violent although I can see why in a way since he's never actually severely physically hurt anyone, compared to those juveniles who have shot someone or actually carried out a malicious wounding.) I'm regrouping and am updating on me in the WC instead of in General. I will say though that I have cut that final cord with my mother. I just got so tired of her living in her own delusion and replied to her last email of doom and gloom about her "friends" and her house selling when it's all she has (is it any wonder-- she never cared about anything except her stuff and money and won't listen to any advice or join forces and she's always been this way)....anyway, here was the bulk of my response, after showing my due pity for her situation: [I][B]difficult child[/B] got recommitted to the state juvenile justice system- that is incarceration, not social services taking him away from home. He will be there longer this time than last time so that basicly blows his teenage years and a lot of possibility for getting things turned around. No matter who you want to blame for it, it would take some intensive therapy and rehabilitation to get him on the right track now and incarceration doesn't provide that. Social services does but due to the previous actions of you and [B]Bro[/B], I can't get [B]difficult child[/B] help or transitional services thru them. I hope you remember that the next time you are "in a panic because you love him so much".[/I] My mother could have been the person that instigated the phrase "talk is cheap". When difficult child was out for that first short period, she was emailing me telling me to tell him that she really hoped she could see him soon. Now I ask you, how much sense does that make when she said we couldn't come there, so we had no choice but to stay here and he had to be in school so couldn't travel to her (where we weren't welcome anyway), and she was selling her house to move 2 states away with no plans to visit us? I ignored that at first then after receiving a few like that, I responded with "Exactly HOW do you plan on seeing him?" and she replied that she didn't know but wanted him to know she loved him. No, she wants to "look good" and never own up to her contribution in all the koi- just as it's been all my life. But what burns me most- she says her bro (the one who raped me after she brought him to our home to live when he was released from a criminally insane ward of a psychiatric hospital upon condition that he receive intensive outpatient therapy and the entire family would be involved in therapy) was the way he was because their mother never held him accountable and I have been the cause of difficult child's problem. OK, well even if I bought that I caused every one of difficult child's problems, if I messed him up that bad then wouldn't we still need therapy and him need something pretty intensive to get it turned around? Nope- just like she never made it a condition for her bro in order for him to live with us, and Lord knows, she never allowed anyone in the family to pursue therapy as long as they lived under her roof. That was considered a punishment she threatened. So her bro spirals downward until I am raped by him. difficult child- she "couldn't stand him going to DSS"- mind you, I was trying to get him into a therapeutic environment. Nope- she had to get my bro involved who has always wanted custody. Ma. PHD in psychiatric. How many generations and lives can she ruin? I asked her about 2 months ago if she didn't think her bro was mentally ill- she said nope, he was just messed up by their mother. And unfortunately, I'm starting to come to terms with the fact that many in the Department of Juvenile Justice system still look at things like this too. Their definition of mentally ill or needing MH treatment usually only covers the completely delusional or insane. OMG the regrets I have. Maybe that seems like re-hashing but it's the stuff that gets stirred up when this toxic woman starts her passive agressive koi. And I will bet the last dollars in my pocket that she will react to my last email by calling her sister and whining about me blaming her for all my problems and her sister will buy it. This would be the sister who caught their bro in a room with her 5 yo daughter naked when he was supposed to be babysitting but never reported him. [/QUOTE]
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