NOLA
New Member
I just had to vent
..I cant believe its been over a month since I asked for advice & posted I want to do something by this weekend Well, the weekend turned into a month
.but today was finally our day in court.
A day or so after I had posted really wanting to push his court date up difficult children cell phone calls home accidentally & I got to hear him and 2 or 3 of his friends driving around town getting loaded even with their music blaring I could hear stuff like let me see that gram it made me sick.
I call the PO the next morning but he wanted to meet with difficult child in his office (since he is new & barely even knows our situation) before he requested the date be moved up & wasnt comfortable with recommending an in-patient rehab, etc., without giving difficult child some face-to-face time. Well I brought him in and it was the SOS
.then he tells me when difficult child is giving a sample that I should have an evaluation done to support the recommendation since the one done when difficult child first came home in Feb basically said your son presents as a social user and definitely doesnt need in-patient, out-patient or even therapy! 
He pretty much told us to back off with the nagging, dont expect him to live life on our timeframe (i.e., school isnt for everyone at that age) set some rules we can live with and let him make the choices. Great so if I drag him to another evaluation to get what I think he needs, even in difficult children stupor he will know whats up. So, I call PO back, plead my case & he agrees. Calls back that afternoon & says show up in court tomorrow at 8:30!! Then its time for me to deal with my husband (who by the way must be related to Mikeys wife!)
He now chooses to focus on the progress difficult child has made like keeping his job and coming home on time. He doesnt think difficult child is seriously into drugs, he is into the rebellion of it all and trying to find his way. We should just continue to try to work with him & agrees with the counselor that did the evaluation & if I have him locked up hell loose his job, etc. husband is thinking surely after the meeting with the PO hell get his act together and actually do the whopping 20 hours of community service that was ordered & reschedule the GED and manage to produce a clean drug screen before 4/24. WRONG!!!
So, off we go to court this morning as originally planned and after waiting for about 2 ½ miserable hours we go in. After the judge asks some pretty simple questions like
Have you completed the community service? and Have you obtained your GED? hears from the PO he is still testing positive then she asked us whats going on & I present her with a one-page overview of the past 2 months she read it & difficult child started with the Ill agree to out-patient, AA meetings, therapy, anything I really cant be locked up she
slaps him with 15 days in detention & asked us our opinion on in-patient treatment. After it becomes obvious we arent on the same page, difficult child is escorted out. I expressed my feelings and husband did the same we could not be any further apart in our views. She agreed with me that in-patient treatment was indicated and ordered it and even ordered another psychiatric evaluation done while hes in detention.
husband hasnt said much to me other than the necessities I know he thinks Im still trying to control things that are not in my control; have fallen prey to the troubled teen industry, money grubbing facilities; watch too much Intervention; and trying to punish difficult child for not doing what I want. This isnt going to be an easy road.
A day or so after I had posted really wanting to push his court date up difficult children cell phone calls home accidentally & I got to hear him and 2 or 3 of his friends driving around town getting loaded even with their music blaring I could hear stuff like let me see that gram it made me sick.
I call the PO the next morning but he wanted to meet with difficult child in his office (since he is new & barely even knows our situation) before he requested the date be moved up & wasnt comfortable with recommending an in-patient rehab, etc., without giving difficult child some face-to-face time. Well I brought him in and it was the SOS
.then he tells me when difficult child is giving a sample that I should have an evaluation done to support the recommendation since the one done when difficult child first came home in Feb basically said your son presents as a social user and definitely doesnt need in-patient, out-patient or even therapy! He pretty much told us to back off with the nagging, dont expect him to live life on our timeframe (i.e., school isnt for everyone at that age) set some rules we can live with and let him make the choices. Great so if I drag him to another evaluation to get what I think he needs, even in difficult children stupor he will know whats up. So, I call PO back, plead my case & he agrees. Calls back that afternoon & says show up in court tomorrow at 8:30!! Then its time for me to deal with my husband (who by the way must be related to Mikeys wife!)
He now chooses to focus on the progress difficult child has made like keeping his job and coming home on time. He doesnt think difficult child is seriously into drugs, he is into the rebellion of it all and trying to find his way. We should just continue to try to work with him & agrees with the counselor that did the evaluation & if I have him locked up hell loose his job, etc. husband is thinking surely after the meeting with the PO hell get his act together and actually do the whopping 20 hours of community service that was ordered & reschedule the GED and manage to produce a clean drug screen before 4/24. WRONG!!!
So, off we go to court this morning as originally planned and after waiting for about 2 ½ miserable hours we go in. After the judge asks some pretty simple questions like
Have you completed the community service? and Have you obtained your GED? hears from the PO he is still testing positive then she asked us whats going on & I present her with a one-page overview of the past 2 months she read it & difficult child started with the Ill agree to out-patient, AA meetings, therapy, anything I really cant be locked up she slaps him with 15 days in detention & asked us our opinion on in-patient treatment. After it becomes obvious we arent on the same page, difficult child is escorted out. I expressed my feelings and husband did the same we could not be any further apart in our views. She agreed with me that in-patient treatment was indicated and ordered it and even ordered another psychiatric evaluation done while hes in detention.
husband hasnt said much to me other than the necessities I know he thinks Im still trying to control things that are not in my control; have fallen prey to the troubled teen industry, money grubbing facilities; watch too much Intervention; and trying to punish difficult child for not doing what I want. This isnt going to be an easy road.
