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General Parenting
Crazy thoughts, needing some guidance from experienced parents!
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<blockquote data-quote="Blueknight" data-source="post: 569823" data-attributes="member: 15054"><p>Hi again all,</p><p></p><p>I posted awhile back about my son, who lives with his mother in another state (12yo boy). He is in a special needs school for education, had a normal IQ, but has OCC, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED), Depression/Anxiety issues. He is currently on Zoloft, Guanfacine, Adderall, and Abilify. He lives with his mother full time, visiting me twice a year for about a month. For brevity on background, he was involved in sexual activity (touching of my niece) and his visits are tough as we have to watch him like a hawk around my other small children. </p><p></p><p>So to my question: I have issues with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) in that I dread the worst of all possible situations. The recent school shooting probably did not help with my ongoing thoughts. My son has made violent threats around his mother about other kids, his mom, and hurting himself. This often happens when he is not getting his way with something (as opposed to out of the blue). Maybe because I am more sensitive to the subject, I see a lot of media reports on kids killing their parents or family members. So yes, I have media overload of information on these types of cases.</p><p></p><p>My problem is that while he and I have a distant relationship, I often worry and fear about the future: how he will be, will he hurt someone, will things ever get better for him...etc. I wonder if these are thoughts from me having Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), common thoughts for parents with troubled kids, or what..! </p><p></p><p>I'm relatively new to the research and reading on kids with issues, because like I said he lives with his mom most of the time. When he visits, the only troubling things he does is cuss a lot, throws fits when disciplined, and for sure wants things his way. I feel lack of empowerment over the whole situation since he lives far away. </p><p></p><p>Another question: I am bombarded with negative visions of how he may turn out. It seems to me he is on a lot of medications and I wonder if he isn't rolling through as a zombie for now, and when he is an adult he pushes away the medications and goes off the deep end. In your guys opinion/experience, have you seen many kids who have these problems grow up to be okay adults? (I know tell me the future!) A friend of mine told me to start assuming he will turn out great and to stop focusing on the negative, but obviously when you have thoughts of your little kid growing up to be a psycho killer it doesn't help the negativity go away.</p><p></p><p>Thanks for any feedback and happy holidays <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/choir.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":choir:" title="choir :choir:" data-shortname=":choir:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Blueknight, post: 569823, member: 15054"] Hi again all, I posted awhile back about my son, who lives with his mother in another state (12yo boy). He is in a special needs school for education, had a normal IQ, but has OCC, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED), Depression/Anxiety issues. He is currently on Zoloft, Guanfacine, Adderall, and Abilify. He lives with his mother full time, visiting me twice a year for about a month. For brevity on background, he was involved in sexual activity (touching of my niece) and his visits are tough as we have to watch him like a hawk around my other small children. So to my question: I have issues with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) in that I dread the worst of all possible situations. The recent school shooting probably did not help with my ongoing thoughts. My son has made violent threats around his mother about other kids, his mom, and hurting himself. This often happens when he is not getting his way with something (as opposed to out of the blue). Maybe because I am more sensitive to the subject, I see a lot of media reports on kids killing their parents or family members. So yes, I have media overload of information on these types of cases. My problem is that while he and I have a distant relationship, I often worry and fear about the future: how he will be, will he hurt someone, will things ever get better for him...etc. I wonder if these are thoughts from me having Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), common thoughts for parents with troubled kids, or what..! I'm relatively new to the research and reading on kids with issues, because like I said he lives with his mom most of the time. When he visits, the only troubling things he does is cuss a lot, throws fits when disciplined, and for sure wants things his way. I feel lack of empowerment over the whole situation since he lives far away. Another question: I am bombarded with negative visions of how he may turn out. It seems to me he is on a lot of medications and I wonder if he isn't rolling through as a zombie for now, and when he is an adult he pushes away the medications and goes off the deep end. In your guys opinion/experience, have you seen many kids who have these problems grow up to be okay adults? (I know tell me the future!) A friend of mine told me to start assuming he will turn out great and to stop focusing on the negative, but obviously when you have thoughts of your little kid growing up to be a psycho killer it doesn't help the negativity go away. Thanks for any feedback and happy holidays :choir: [/QUOTE]
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