Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
daughter-12 raging, destructive behavior ... help!
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 119558" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Hon, that is sooooooooo typical. Spectrum kids are rule followers and get agitated when somebody breaks a rule. Lucas is just like your son. I know that if I give him a list of rules, he'll follow them moreso than my "typical" daughter. He won't touch the stove either or let in a stranger or answer the phone if I tell him not to. But he'll have a fit if I try to interrupt him too quickly from something he feels obsessed to finish. That's why we ease it down, even on the easy stuff. We don't let him "get away" with stuff, but we don't abruptly cut him off unless it's an emergency. I have learned I have to parent all my kids differently. He is the fourth of five and is a very different experience than my other kids. In fact, they are ALL very different so I do what works best for them and for the family. Not all kids who seem defiant are being that way to take control. In the case of a child on the spectrum, in my opinion it's more anxiety related, rule related, transition related, etc. That doesn't mean they don't mouth off and should be allowed to do it. They shouldn't. Just saying that the motive isn't usually to control mom and dad--it's more because they are extremely frustrated because they think something is very important that "typical" people don't care about (such as making sure everything is in ONE certain place). And punishing them over it won't change who they are. I suggest reading Tony Attwood books. They are fantastic <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 119558, member: 1550"] Hon, that is sooooooooo typical. Spectrum kids are rule followers and get agitated when somebody breaks a rule. Lucas is just like your son. I know that if I give him a list of rules, he'll follow them moreso than my "typical" daughter. He won't touch the stove either or let in a stranger or answer the phone if I tell him not to. But he'll have a fit if I try to interrupt him too quickly from something he feels obsessed to finish. That's why we ease it down, even on the easy stuff. We don't let him "get away" with stuff, but we don't abruptly cut him off unless it's an emergency. I have learned I have to parent all my kids differently. He is the fourth of five and is a very different experience than my other kids. In fact, they are ALL very different so I do what works best for them and for the family. Not all kids who seem defiant are being that way to take control. In the case of a child on the spectrum, in my opinion it's more anxiety related, rule related, transition related, etc. That doesn't mean they don't mouth off and should be allowed to do it. They shouldn't. Just saying that the motive isn't usually to control mom and dad--it's more because they are extremely frustrated because they think something is very important that "typical" people don't care about (such as making sure everything is in ONE certain place). And punishing them over it won't change who they are. I suggest reading Tony Attwood books. They are fantastic ;) [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
daughter-12 raging, destructive behavior ... help!
Top