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DD1 is really scaring me I need insights PLEASE
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<blockquote data-quote="seriously" data-source="post: 429948" data-attributes="member: 11920"><p>That sounds like Bipolar Mania with ADHD thrown in to spice things up. But it could just be mania. Or neither one - not a doctor and she absolutely needs a doctor. </p><p></p><p>But it sounds similar to what we see here at times. If that's what it is, then it sounds like she has the kind of sudden drop into depression that difficult child 2 gets as part of the mood swing. It is profound but usually brief - lasts at most 2 or 3 hours and then he usually falls asleep and wakes up relatively OK. Often insists that none of the things he did just before the drop happened - it's as if they've been wiped from his memory. Swoop up, switch from flight of ideas (rapidly switching between activities/focus) to extreme irritability to raging with threats to others, defiance, fixation on a goal that puts him in direct conflict with everyone else, may peak with actual attempts to injure others or himself or damage property and then wham - sobbing, life is not worth living, I am a terrible person...</p><p></p><p>If that's what you're seeing then I think it's bipolar or drug-induced bipolar. Could be other issues layered on top which makes it really hard to diagnosis. Most complex cases take years of observation and various treatment attempts to sort out all the strands and find what works. That includes pretty much all our difficult child's. It's nobody's fault it's just the way it is.</p><p></p><p>You are going to have to be patient, keep good records if you can of what medications are tried and what changes are seen, who's given what diagnosis and why. And then focus on figuring out what triggers her, how to reduce the triggers and how to help her recover.</p><p></p><p>However, regardless of the diagnosis, the behavior has to be managed appropriately. And I have some strong opinions on that subject. Take them FWIW and use what works for you, toss the rest. </p><p></p><p>I didn't have time to give much input last time but I have to tell you that I do not think you should stare her in the eye or give her lots of kisses in the face etc. if she's threatening you with a fork or other sharp object.</p><p></p><p>When he's combative, angry and agitated (mania + depressed mood = mixed mood) difficult child 2 can be very dangerous and we handle him with kid gloves. If he crosses the line and we feel he or others are no longer safe then we have hospitalized him or called the police for help. His first hospitalization was at age 10 after he tried to use a wrought iron curtain rod to beat me. His twin sister was here and saw it all. If you had asked me if my son would ever tear the drapes down in his room, take out the heavy curtain rod and try to attack me with it - I would have told you NO.</p><p></p><p>You owe it to your daughter, your family and yourself to take her threatening behavior at face value and take action.</p><p></p><p>If she actually hurts you - if she'd used the fork - she could have blinded or seriously injured you. What then? She would have to live with that the rest of her long life. Do you want to burden a 10 year old with that grief and guilt?</p><p></p><p>Your other child would have witnessed her sister attack and seriously injure you. Do you think her relationship with her sister would survive that?</p><p></p><p>And you would be unable to take care of her while she endured the aftermath of that assault, live in fear of her along with the tremendous consequences of the physical injury.</p><p></p><p>I know she would never hurt you in a million years - when she's in her right mind. But she is NOT in her right mind when she is like that and it is really dangerous not to take that seriously.</p><p></p><p>If she is having that level of agitation and oddity of behavior she needs to be hospitalized in my humble opinion. Take it FWIW but when she is in that much distress, I think she needs the kind of help she can (hopefully) get at a psychiatric hospital and can't get at home, no matter how much you love her and try to help her.</p><p></p><p>And she is in distress. </p><p></p><p>She may not realize everything she's doing but she knows enough to be frightened and to know that you cannot stop it from happening. If you put yourself in her shoes, would you want people to stand by and let you act that way - including threatening people you love with forks - and do nothing but offer you kisses? Kisses are very important - don't get me wrong. But they are not enough and will not make this go away.</p><p></p><p>I am so very sorry that you and she are going through this. It is terrifying. I hope you find answers and that things get better quickly.</p><p></p><p>Peace</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="seriously, post: 429948, member: 11920"] That sounds like Bipolar Mania with ADHD thrown in to spice things up. But it could just be mania. Or neither one - not a doctor and she absolutely needs a doctor. But it sounds similar to what we see here at times. If that's what it is, then it sounds like she has the kind of sudden drop into depression that difficult child 2 gets as part of the mood swing. It is profound but usually brief - lasts at most 2 or 3 hours and then he usually falls asleep and wakes up relatively OK. Often insists that none of the things he did just before the drop happened - it's as if they've been wiped from his memory. Swoop up, switch from flight of ideas (rapidly switching between activities/focus) to extreme irritability to raging with threats to others, defiance, fixation on a goal that puts him in direct conflict with everyone else, may peak with actual attempts to injure others or himself or damage property and then wham - sobbing, life is not worth living, I am a terrible person... If that's what you're seeing then I think it's bipolar or drug-induced bipolar. Could be other issues layered on top which makes it really hard to diagnosis. Most complex cases take years of observation and various treatment attempts to sort out all the strands and find what works. That includes pretty much all our difficult child's. It's nobody's fault it's just the way it is. You are going to have to be patient, keep good records if you can of what medications are tried and what changes are seen, who's given what diagnosis and why. And then focus on figuring out what triggers her, how to reduce the triggers and how to help her recover. However, regardless of the diagnosis, the behavior has to be managed appropriately. And I have some strong opinions on that subject. Take them FWIW and use what works for you, toss the rest. I didn't have time to give much input last time but I have to tell you that I do not think you should stare her in the eye or give her lots of kisses in the face etc. if she's threatening you with a fork or other sharp object. When he's combative, angry and agitated (mania + depressed mood = mixed mood) difficult child 2 can be very dangerous and we handle him with kid gloves. If he crosses the line and we feel he or others are no longer safe then we have hospitalized him or called the police for help. His first hospitalization was at age 10 after he tried to use a wrought iron curtain rod to beat me. His twin sister was here and saw it all. If you had asked me if my son would ever tear the drapes down in his room, take out the heavy curtain rod and try to attack me with it - I would have told you NO. You owe it to your daughter, your family and yourself to take her threatening behavior at face value and take action. If she actually hurts you - if she'd used the fork - she could have blinded or seriously injured you. What then? She would have to live with that the rest of her long life. Do you want to burden a 10 year old with that grief and guilt? Your other child would have witnessed her sister attack and seriously injure you. Do you think her relationship with her sister would survive that? And you would be unable to take care of her while she endured the aftermath of that assault, live in fear of her along with the tremendous consequences of the physical injury. I know she would never hurt you in a million years - when she's in her right mind. But she is NOT in her right mind when she is like that and it is really dangerous not to take that seriously. If she is having that level of agitation and oddity of behavior she needs to be hospitalized in my humble opinion. Take it FWIW but when she is in that much distress, I think she needs the kind of help she can (hopefully) get at a psychiatric hospital and can't get at home, no matter how much you love her and try to help her. And she is in distress. She may not realize everything she's doing but she knows enough to be frightened and to know that you cannot stop it from happening. If you put yourself in her shoes, would you want people to stand by and let you act that way - including threatening people you love with forks - and do nothing but offer you kisses? Kisses are very important - don't get me wrong. But they are not enough and will not make this go away. I am so very sorry that you and she are going through this. It is terrifying. I hope you find answers and that things get better quickly. Peace [/QUOTE]
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