dead chicken means the end of the world around here.

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by EStephens, Jul 26, 2012.

  1. EStephens

    EStephens New Member

    Today my difficult child, big kid stumbled upon his pet chicken, "Nugget" and she had been mauled by some creature. She had to be put down because she was too torn up to be saved and she was suffering. difficult child has cried for hours. His animals mean more to him than his family does.
    Loss is never easy, I know that but he is absolutely crushed. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to help him?
    Thanks in advance.
     
  2. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Gosh, I would just sit with him and hold him. If he is comfortable in his room, I would check on him every 15 min. If he says things like "I hate the world," I would just agree with him.
    I am so sorry.
     
  3. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Poor kid, I would be so gentle with him, remembering that kids under a certain age cannot understand death. This can be a traumatic moment for him and I would approach it gently and lovingly and really allow him to express himself, his loss, his sorrow and be present with him as best you can. Your real presence, right there in the moment, really getting how hurt he is, in my opinion, will mean everything to him.
     
  4. EStephens

    EStephens New Member

    Thanks guys. He and I talked about how evil some animals are to each other and about how much Nugget meant to him. He zoned out on his iPod for most of the day and by golly I let him. Thanks again for the encouragement and the advice.
     
  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    You live in Texas. What kind of enclosed area was Nugget in? Did he has complete roam of the yard or did he have a coop?

    We used to raise chickens and I have some ideas for you when and if you are ready to get him a new chicken. I would bet my right arm that Nugget got mangled by either a hawk or an owl. Or it could have been some sort of dog or bobcat but Im pretty sure they would have taken the chicken with them unless you have a whole lot of chickens.

    I would make the new chicken/s a coop that is about 3 foot off the ground and about about 3 foot by 5 foot. with a roof on it. I would build a fence around their area with chicken or hog wire which is not expensive at all, and make it about 25 foot per side. That gives them plenty of space to run around. Put a top on it. You can bend the top across with large sticks so its tall enough for you guys to walk inside it. If you want eggs from this chickens, make sure you get one rooster and at least 3 hens. Once they get old enough to lay eggs, feed them laying mash and feed them either oyster shells or crush up their eggs shells after you eat them and feed them those in their feed.
     
  6. EStephens

    EStephens New Member

    Nugget was a free range chicken. We have several, she just wasn't a fan of our rooster so she wouldn't hang with the rest of the flock. She was Big Kid's (difficult child) pet. He was the only one of us who could sit and hold her. We have a coop and the other chickens stay in it, she just didn't like it. We have had her well over a year. I guess we knew it could happen, we just didn't wanna think of it.
    Big kid is better today. We buried Nugget and he said the absolute sweetest prayer at the burial and I think that was the most heartfelt graveside burial for a chicken ever. We are making a cross as a tombstone for her so we can remember her by.
    There is a part of my brain that is absolutely sure I have lost my mind by having a burial for a chicken, but I guess since God allowed Big Kid to have Asperger's he will have to equip me with sanity sooner or later.
     
  7. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I'm glad you buried Nugget and that difficult child said a sweet prayer. Sigh.
    Yes, it is strange to bury a chicken, while we turn around and eat ... nuggets ... ;b ... but it's not about that. It's about your son.
     
  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Well at least you didnt make chicken stew out of nugget! When my SO was a kid, they had a pig that they somewhat tamed and made a pet out of it because it was the runt of the litter. Pigs happen to be quite smart. These folks were very poor and lived on a farm. Well eventually the pig got hurt and they had to kill it and they ate pet pork for quite awhile. Their father wasnt exactly a warm and fuzzy man.
     
  9. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    ES, I don't think you have lost our mind, I think you're a loving mom who is there for her children. When I was 12 my best friend's hamster, Barney died. She and her mom and sister and brother and I all attended Barney's funeral, wrapped in a shoe box, buried in the backyard. My friend was crying and very upset. Almost 50 years later, my friend still, on occasion, recalls that moment with tenderness, still grateful that we all were there for her. Sometimes it may seem odd to you, but in his young heart, this is a dramatic moment and could be a lasting memory of which you were an integral, loving, sweet part. I think you did a great job.
     
  10. EStephens

    EStephens New Member

    difficult child is a farm kid. The circle of life seems to hit him more often then not. There are always sick babies, still borns, botched surgeries, and old age. And he has two FFA pigs each year. (I still don't tell him that we eat one, but he knows what pork is and where is comes from.)

    Thanks for the support guys.
    I swear I feel like I can breathe having a sounding board!!!
     
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