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Parent Emeritus
Dealing with the anger
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 419919" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Eliza</p><p></p><p>I have done that to Nichole many many times over the years. Oh, I haven't shouted it at her......cuz I usually don't say it until she's calmed down doing that Everything Should Just Be Fine Cuz I'm Not (mad, sad, off the deep end whatever). I'd point out to her repeatedly that just because she was over it, doesn't mean those she unleashed on or whatever were over it. Not everyone can turn it on and off like she can/could. A couple of years of that and it started sinking in. I think it sunk in better because I was usually calm when I said it to her. At first I really don't think it dawned on her that other people might be affected by her words/actions long term. She seemed baffled by it. Enough explaining.......and making sure family were telling her the same thing (cuz they felt the same way) to reinforce it......and she finally got it. </p><p></p><p>I'm still not sure if it was a hang over from teendom "it's all about me" syndrome or what.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 419919, member: 84"] Eliza I have done that to Nichole many many times over the years. Oh, I haven't shouted it at her......cuz I usually don't say it until she's calmed down doing that Everything Should Just Be Fine Cuz I'm Not (mad, sad, off the deep end whatever). I'd point out to her repeatedly that just because she was over it, doesn't mean those she unleashed on or whatever were over it. Not everyone can turn it on and off like she can/could. A couple of years of that and it started sinking in. I think it sunk in better because I was usually calm when I said it to her. At first I really don't think it dawned on her that other people might be affected by her words/actions long term. She seemed baffled by it. Enough explaining.......and making sure family were telling her the same thing (cuz they felt the same way) to reinforce it......and she finally got it. I'm still not sure if it was a hang over from teendom "it's all about me" syndrome or what. [/QUOTE]
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