Defiant Child - Part 4

Discussion in 'General Parenting Archives' started by -, Nov 10, 2000.

  1. Guest

    part 4/ Defiant child

    The Definition of competent and appropriate behavior. p. 119
    ~why do kids place so much importance upon attitude?
    ~it's the only thing they own!!!
    ~since it's all they own they spend time perfecting it
    ~parent's have the right to demand that their children make themselves pleasant to be around
    ~Necessary skills for projecting a pleasant attitude include:
    ~ eye contact--ODD kids refuse to make it as a purposeful insult and a show of defiance. adults demand it because it conveys respect and willingness to engage in interpersonal interactions
    *ground rule p. 122
    ~nonverbal communication--teens may slouch or turn away from you while being spoken to, roll their eyes, make faces or exaggerated expressions and laughing at what you say
    ~when called on the above behaviors, they'll probably deny doing it, they feel they have done nothing wrong since they haven't hit, swore at or grabbed anyone.
    *ground rules p. 123
    ~verbal reciprocation--being able to use more than one word as an answer
    ~learning to talk--some kids just don't know how to talk to other people
    ~they know how to argue, use put downs, etc, but not to have a conversation
    ***they must be taught how to state their opinions without being offensive to others*** they are entitled to have their opinions, but state them appropriately
    *ground rules p. 127
    ~Group interaction--being in groups will teach your teen to be one of the gang, so they will be more at ease with others
    *ground rules p. 130
    ~Choosing appropriate friends --please meet your child's friends
    ~tell teen you want him to broaden his group of associates.

    end of part 4 / part 5 coming soon.....
  2. Guest

    jessica'smom- can you add this to the archive?? thanks.........

    Ellenkath, AKA: DRAMA MAMA, Mom of: male difficult child 15 yr.Diagnosed ADHD at 10 yr. Recently diagnosed ODD, possible emerging bi-polar. In day treatment program since spring 2000. Male easy child 18 yr.
    Co-facilitator for a Parents Helping Parents support group, URL=
    Are we having fun yet?? "He who laughs, lasts." M.P. Poole