Defiant teen

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by scoot, Jul 6, 2013.

  1. scoot

    scoot New Member

    How can I tell if my teens sons behavior is normal,a sign of ODD,or other behavior disorder or out of control?He is going to be 16,has special needs and is medically disabled.His behavior is at home,with his sister and little nefews ,me and when he was at school.I am needing help as to knowing what to do,my daughter told me he is out of control and needs to be put in a home.Meanwhile,I don't want that but I feel helpless and just don't want to fight any more.I'm scared for his future.
     
  2. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Can you tell us more about his special needs and disabilities?
    What dxes does he have?
    What kinds of accommodations, interventions, etc.?
     
  3. scoot

    scoot New Member

    Well,its a long story,he was born with kidney damage,one kidney functioning at like 17 prevent.Developmental delays.At age one,til age 5 he went to Kids First,preschool,there they said they were having problems,but thought it wasvADHD.They also said,he would never read or learn.In Kindergarten,they tested him and he was diagnosis'd with ADHD non medicated.He had behavior problems up until 6th grade,which I took as everyday boy problems and Adhd stuff.I always thought he showed signs of Autism, but it was always dismissed. He has problems socially,Has no friends,no empathy either.He can't read social cueing or relate to others properly.At a young age he ran away from home,because he couldn't get his way.I didn't think nothing of it.Then one day in grammar school,he just decided he wanted to leave and he walked out of the school.Think that was 1st grade.Nothing really was out of the ordinary until last year or so,during the summer,kids younger than him didn't want to b around him.He got frustrasted,told me he was going out and never came back.He ended up riding his bike to his grandmothers house.Called cops and they brought him home.I was having trouble with-his IEP staff,during 5th and6th grade Andi decided,to home school him.Thing when homeschooling him didn't go well with her,everyday was a struggle to get him to work.9th grade was last year,we'd decided to let him go back to school.It starts here in August,the IEP did not have anything on his IEP in the way of Behavior.Before school started,I took him to the developmental center,he did not qualify for ADHD.they diagnosed him,with Borderline IQ,pychomotor deficit,and frontal lobe and executive disorder.she gave me a list of reccomendations to add to his IEP,only 2 were- added.He had a total of 3 things listed,none for behavior.Any how so came the behavior when they pushed him to do work he didn't want to do.My sons only interest is video games.Last year in a matter of 3 months,he's gotten suyspened twice.I took him back out to home school him..He never stays where he says he's going to b,The other day,I found porn all over the devices and started putting parental controls on therm.This set off his explosive behavior.He's knocked over thing,raised his voice at me,slammed doors,but yesterday,when he's highly upset he says ugly things,he got into it with-his sister and knocked out a plate of food from her had,breaking the plate.She ended up leaving and tyold me she weon't b back that he is out of control,and needs to go into a home.He has to go back to school because financially I can't home school him anymore,but he can't go back and do what he did last year.
     
  4. scoot

    scoot New Member

    I replied don't see it
     
  5. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Either the computer ate it (happens to all of us once in a while), or it's gone to "quarantine" - happens especially with posts by new members. If it's gone to quarantine, it will show up later.
     
  6. scoot

    scoot New Member

    I sent two replies did they go thru
     
  7. scoot

    scoot New Member

    No accommodations listed for behavior,3 in total for work.Frontal lobe and executive function deficits,psychomotor delays and borderline IQ.developmental delayed,kidney damage and social skill issues.
     
  8. scoot

    scoot New Member

    Is there a chat room to talk?
     
  9. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Most of us - including me - do not use chat.
    Weekends tend to be slow, but others will be coming around at some point.

    What does he have for dxes? (diagnoses)
    "Developmentally delayed" can have a number of root causes, and the approaches would be different.
    "Psychomotor" is not a term I'm familiar with, perhaps related to "neuro-motor control"? As in, nothing wrong with the muscles and nerves, but difficulty in getting brain and the physique working well together?
    Social skills issues can also be found in a number of different dxes
     
  10. scoot

    scoot New Member

    Frontal lobe executive function deficits and borderline I Q.no further explanations were given to me,but I dfo have copies of the results from the delay center.those were his current diagnosis'es. from age before 5 up until last year,he was diagnosis'e as ADHD,but developmental delay center said he didn't qualify with that diagnosis.The counselor suggested that he seems like he might be on the Autism spectrum as well as ODD,but no official diagnosis was made,nor does he want to participate in counseling.
     
  11. scoot

    scoot New Member

    Phycomotor is having to do w his writing,I think at least thats what I was told.
     
  12. SomewhereOutThere

    SomewhereOutThere Well-Known Member

    Has he ever had a comprehensive evaluatijon by a neuropsychologist. He sure sounds like he has some form of moderate autism to me. It's often hard to get that diagnosis unless you have somebody see him who knows how to find it. I doubt if it's just ADHD and ODD is useless , especially for a sixteen year old. It's kind of a throwaway diagnosis. when a therapist has no idea what is in a younger child.

    I'm curious about his early life. Was he adopted? Any neglect or abuse by one of the parents? Any switching around of caregivers? Did he have to spend long stretches of time away from you in the hospital? Much of his behavior sounds like it could be a form of attachment disorder. Has he ever maybe acted out sexually to anyone, like your daughter?
     
    Last edited: Jul 6, 2013
  13. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) - autism spectrum disorder - is one of the "pervasive developmental disorders".
    It would automatically include:
    - social skills challenges
    - developmental delay
    - often, motor skills issues
    - usually, sensory processing issues
    - often, auditory processing issues
    - and so on.

    Counsellors aren't usually in a position to diagnosis anything, but some are quite knowledgeable. Might be a good tip there, at least enough to be worth following up on.

    BUT... some of it could be related to things like cerebral palsy, for example. Only a high-quality comprehensive evaluation would go through all the options and give you a fairly solid answer.
     
  14. scoot

    scoot New Member

    The developmental center said he wasn't ADHD,but he did have a nuero done therre,they basically followed his first evaulation.His dad abuses drugs and alcohol. His dad was diagnosed with-paranoid schizophrenia,which I think its drug induced.Yes he was air flown to children's hospital,shortly after birth,stayed there about a month.I went the day after he was bornl to be with him.He weighed 10 pounds,mostly fluid build up,he had to be vacummed out in delivery.He didn't want to come out,he didn't have sucking reflexes either and had to be fed thru a tube in his nose.
     
  15. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Neuro - as in neurologist? or neuropsychologist? There's a big difference. Some times both are required, but they have very different training.
     
  16. scoot

    scoot New Member

    The Counslor did suggest Autisum,think she said PPD-not otherwise specified, sorry if misspelled.She also agreed he was defiant and she also said something about anxiety disorder.She said he would get tested for those,and referred me but they have not called with-an appointment yet.
     
  17. scoot

    scoot New Member

    Neuropsychologist
     
  18. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Who did she refer you to? (not names, but titles... psychiatrist, psychologist, neuropsychologist, evaluation team, etc.)

    Anxiety often goes with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)/Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) - because they are wired differently, they can't quite make sense of the world around them, and it doesn't take long before the anxiety goes up and stays there.

    Meanwhile, do some reading up on anything you can get your hands on that is even remotely related - Asperger's, Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD), Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD)-not otherwise specified... they are all strongly related, just a few degrees of difference.

    By the way, are you in North America? or "somewhere else"? It makes a difference on what kind of advice you get - what works in North America may not work elsewhere, and even what works in the US may not work in Canada, for example.
     
  19. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    We were posting at the same time. Assuming you're in the US, neuropsychologist is usually a good evaluation.
     
  20. scoot

    scoot New Member

    There was one incident,where I think,he was outside and he had his arm around a girl,she is quite younger,and his hand graded her chest,she told her parents that my son tried to touch her,and her father,was the eating to call the police,later I found out that the girls brother got into it with-my son,and my son exploded and said if he tried to hit him,he was going to kill him,well the father,told him that was terroristic threating the next time he does or says anything like that he will call the police.At this point my so so upset he was crying.Later my son said it was taken out of context,He said he never tried to touch the girl thast his arm hand was hanging over her shoulder and it hit her chest by accident.Nothing like this has ever happened again.Up until I found lesbian porn on the devices about 2 days ago,other searches included,spit porn and aggressive porn..
    :smile:
     
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