Do any of your difficult child's demand (not ask, but demand) that you come to them whenever they want (not need) anything? If my difficult child wants something, I want him to come to me, not whine, demand, threaten: "Mom, get in here or else!" "Mom, you have 20 seconds to get in here!" You would think after 9 years of this not working, it would have stopped by now! I usually go into his room say, "If you want something, you come find me." and then walk away. (I can tell when he really needs something or is just trying to be controlling).
We have a blizzard going on today so it is cold out and I can't send him out to his tree or to play. I still have no idea what he wanted but I was in another room while he was in the living room when I heard, "Mom, come here!" "Mom, you have 20 seconds to come or I will put Bella (puppy) outside" "O.K., you have 5 seconds" "OK, Bella is outside" "Mom, she is cold" "OK Mom, I guess I have to keep the door wide open" (he let puppy in because he can't bring himself to hurt puppy) "O.K., I will open the windows until you get here."
At this point, I refuse to address whatever he wanted me for in the 1st place. I am going to address the stupid behavior of threatening me until I do as he says. So, I slammed the doors and windows shut and sent him to his bedroom. I told him he is to stay in there until I calm down. He is never ever to threaten me. I am not his personal slave and he needs to treat me with respect, not like a bag of dirt (or should I say bag of fertilizer?).
So, I guess today's lesson will be on how to ask for something without making the person you are asking of feel like a dirt bag.
Oh, and he has still not breathed a word of what started this. It couldn't have been important or he would have thrown it in my face with "But Mom, I need to tell you something". I think he is just bored with this blizzard weather and looking for attention. With 6 plus inches of snow and more on its way, I guess I am not going anywhere either so on with this battle.
I am calming down and he has been quiet in his room (not sure if that is a good sign or not) so it is about time to go face the music and see if he can think of how he should have gotten my attention without the demands and threats.
We have a blizzard going on today so it is cold out and I can't send him out to his tree or to play. I still have no idea what he wanted but I was in another room while he was in the living room when I heard, "Mom, come here!" "Mom, you have 20 seconds to come or I will put Bella (puppy) outside" "O.K., you have 5 seconds" "OK, Bella is outside" "Mom, she is cold" "OK Mom, I guess I have to keep the door wide open" (he let puppy in because he can't bring himself to hurt puppy) "O.K., I will open the windows until you get here."
At this point, I refuse to address whatever he wanted me for in the 1st place. I am going to address the stupid behavior of threatening me until I do as he says. So, I slammed the doors and windows shut and sent him to his bedroom. I told him he is to stay in there until I calm down. He is never ever to threaten me. I am not his personal slave and he needs to treat me with respect, not like a bag of dirt (or should I say bag of fertilizer?).
So, I guess today's lesson will be on how to ask for something without making the person you are asking of feel like a dirt bag.
Oh, and he has still not breathed a word of what started this. It couldn't have been important or he would have thrown it in my face with "But Mom, I need to tell you something". I think he is just bored with this blizzard weather and looking for attention. With 6 plus inches of snow and more on its way, I guess I am not going anywhere either so on with this battle.
I am calming down and he has been quiet in his room (not sure if that is a good sign or not) so it is about time to go face the music and see if he can think of how he should have gotten my attention without the demands and threats.