rejectedmom
New Member
When mine were minors I worked very hard at "saving" them. I wanted them to learn from their mistakes but not be crippled in life as a result of them. I tried to always be one step ahead and worked hard at keeping my difficult children out of trouble and off the police radar. That coupled with the idea of loosing everything we had because of something stupid they might do kept me from sleeping and fraught with worry. Once they were of legal age I helped difficult child#1 and easy child/difficult child move into their own place and enjoyed the peace of not knowing their every move but unfortunately they still managed to reek havoc on my life. When girlfriend#2 started putting me through one hellacious time after another and rotating in and out of RTCs and jail and shelters and program after program, I realized I could no longer live that way. Detachement was my only salvation without it I never would have survived. Many outsiders without the kind of experience that brings us to this board are apt to judge us as cold and uncaring. I have learned not to care what they might think. These are hard lessons to learn but once we do, we can live relatively peaceful lives. Detachment once so foreign a concept to me has become my life line. I will never again work harder for an adult someone than they are wiling to work for themselves.
