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Substance Abuse
Detecting a sense of quiet resignation among many of us...
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<blockquote data-quote="Nancy" data-source="post: 550199" data-attributes="member: 59"><p>Sig you always seem to be able to put into words exactly how I am feeling, even before I know that's how I'm feeling. But that exaclty how I'm feeling, quiet resignation. And I don't feel the panic once did or the urgency to stop her from self destructing or the overwhelming gloom of disaster pending. I'm just plugging along, finding new outlets for my energy and resigned to the fact that it is what it is and I can't change it. I've been doing a lot of thinking about how I was at her age and how my parents and family were not my first priority and I wanted to live my life the way I wanted. Of course my life plan was on a much better course, but the feelings were the same. So I resigned to the fact that difficult child is not thinking about us and is going about doing what makes her happy at the time. It's me who knows she is on a self destructive path.</p><p></p><p>I am grateful she remembered my birthday and that she seems to want to maintain some contact with us and that is OK for now. I have changed my focus and I am at the point in my life where that is the way it should be. My husband and I cleaned out our garage today. We worked hard and were both very sore when we finished. With my arthritis and his bad knee and back we realize it's time we focus on each other and what is ahead for us. We went to a lovely dinner after and I am grateful that I can now think about other things than what difficult child is doing.</p><p></p><p>And I am eternally grateful to everyone here because if it were not for you I believe I would still be stuck in that awful place of trying to fix difficult child. Our stories are all the same, different difficult child's and a little different circumstances but so much alike. It's not that I have lost hope but I no longer live every day hoping she will call and ask for help. Looking back a couple years ago I never thought I would be able to go on with my life like I have. I was despondant. But today I have things to be happy about and I am at peace. I have done everything I possible could. No regrets.</p><p></p><p>So thank you for this post because it put everything in focus for me and explained why I feel the way I do. And I'm not going anywhere either because everyone here is my family.</p><p></p><p>Nancy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nancy, post: 550199, member: 59"] Sig you always seem to be able to put into words exactly how I am feeling, even before I know that's how I'm feeling. But that exaclty how I'm feeling, quiet resignation. And I don't feel the panic once did or the urgency to stop her from self destructing or the overwhelming gloom of disaster pending. I'm just plugging along, finding new outlets for my energy and resigned to the fact that it is what it is and I can't change it. I've been doing a lot of thinking about how I was at her age and how my parents and family were not my first priority and I wanted to live my life the way I wanted. Of course my life plan was on a much better course, but the feelings were the same. So I resigned to the fact that difficult child is not thinking about us and is going about doing what makes her happy at the time. It's me who knows she is on a self destructive path. I am grateful she remembered my birthday and that she seems to want to maintain some contact with us and that is OK for now. I have changed my focus and I am at the point in my life where that is the way it should be. My husband and I cleaned out our garage today. We worked hard and were both very sore when we finished. With my arthritis and his bad knee and back we realize it's time we focus on each other and what is ahead for us. We went to a lovely dinner after and I am grateful that I can now think about other things than what difficult child is doing. And I am eternally grateful to everyone here because if it were not for you I believe I would still be stuck in that awful place of trying to fix difficult child. Our stories are all the same, different difficult child's and a little different circumstances but so much alike. It's not that I have lost hope but I no longer live every day hoping she will call and ask for help. Looking back a couple years ago I never thought I would be able to go on with my life like I have. I was despondant. But today I have things to be happy about and I am at peace. I have done everything I possible could. No regrets. So thank you for this post because it put everything in focus for me and explained why I feel the way I do. And I'm not going anywhere either because everyone here is my family. Nancy [/QUOTE]
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