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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 558730" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>JKF, I completely agree with Janet, the food is pretty bad. The only distinction I would make is to wait for him to ask you to put money on his "books." That way it ceases to be you anticipating his needs which I believe is a part of enabling and becomes his responsibility to make that request of you. When he calls you, don't allow him to treat you in any way but respectful, you certainly have the option to hang up on him if he is not being appropriate, he has to learn he cannot treat you in the old way anymore and this will be a very good opportunity for you to begin "training" him while he is in no position to make threats and carry them out.</p><p> </p><p>Like Janet and many of us, I know exactly how you are feeling today. You'll get through this and it will get easier; he put himself where he is by his own actions and let's hope on some level he gets that and starts seeing the light. He may have to have a few bouts with the law before his developing brain learns the true meaning of consequences.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 558730, member: 13542"] JKF, I completely agree with Janet, the food is pretty bad. The only distinction I would make is to wait for him to ask you to put money on his "books." That way it ceases to be you anticipating his needs which I believe is a part of enabling and becomes his responsibility to make that request of you. When he calls you, don't allow him to treat you in any way but respectful, you certainly have the option to hang up on him if he is not being appropriate, he has to learn he cannot treat you in the old way anymore and this will be a very good opportunity for you to begin "training" him while he is in no position to make threats and carry them out. Like Janet and many of us, I know exactly how you are feeling today. You'll get through this and it will get easier; he put himself where he is by his own actions and let's hope on some level he gets that and starts seeing the light. He may have to have a few bouts with the law before his developing brain learns the true meaning of consequences. [/QUOTE]
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