Didnt have to wait long....

[toughlovin]

OK So my son called me a little while ago. He talked to the guy at one of the better places that was given to me yesterday. He was told that he can't come in until he tests clean but they can put him up somewhere else. So he had me call that guy. I talked to him and liked him quite a bit over the phone. Sounds like a good place. They wont take him until he is clean but there is another place he can go to until then... the place that I was told will take anyone who is down and out and was an ok place.

This place told him he will need to work hard, it is not a place to just have a vacation. This guy also agreed the other two places difficult child originally told me about were terrible places.

So anyway I called them and paid for a week... and hopefully by the time a week is up he will test clean. And they are going to push him to get a job.

I asked him where he stayed last night and he said he stayed behind the library... so maybe he wasn't out partying.

So I just pray that he gets it this time. I havent said it yet, but I am somehow going to tell him that he really needs to make it work this time. We cant keep doing this.

Anyway I may sleep better tonight knowing he is somewhere and safe. I will feel relieved once he is settled and actually there and hopefully he will let me know that.

Oh and both places test for spice!!! Phew.

TL

 

[DDD]

Gee, that sounds so encouraging. Fingers crossed that this new step will lead to good health. DDD

 

[AmericanGirl]

One step forward...know you will rest better tonight.

 

[Nancy]

I guess that answers the question of whether he was using while in the other place. I'm glad he has a place to stay and encouraged that he followed through and is willing to go. I assume they told him about working hard also and he agreed.

You have gone above and beyond finding him the best places TL. I am so glad you didn't agree to the ones he wanted to go to and pushed for something better. I hope someday he realizes and appreciates what you have done for him. You are a true warrior mom.

I hope you sleep well tonight,
Nancy

 

[Signorina]

Hope the third place is the charm. Glad to read he was proactive! Xing fingers

 

[Tiredof33]

That is such good news to hear!! I'm sure you'll have a great weekend!

 

[Kathy813]

Hooray! It sounds like that is the best possible outcome.

~Kathy

 

[toughlovin]

He just sent me a text "landed".... I sent him back one and said "Good. I am gald. We can't keep moving you from place to place so you need to make it work this time. We know you can so believe in yourself".

I hope that was positive enough but also got the message across.

So yes I will sleep better tonight..... Had a crazy dream last night that I met Johnny Depp... except his name and face were different. LOL...at least I wasn't dreaming about drug use.

TL

 

[toughlovin]

Well difficult child texted me asking if I could give him some money for food as he left all his food at the other place.... gosh he keeps leaving parts of himself behind wherever he goes. I wonder if he has his clothes????

Anyway I can't put money on his grocery card until Monday. I don't think there is any way to get him money easily....certainly not putting money in his bank accout!!! So I told him I couldnt add anything til Monday and I didn't know what to tell him.

Haven't heard back. I figured he may be thin but he won't starve before Monday!!!!

TL

 

[Nancy]

What kind of a place is this that the other place sent him to get clean? Is it a detox center? I am surprised they don't make food available for them. Are they monitoring him physically? And even if he had money on his grocery card are they going to just let him walk out of there and buy food? I don't want to sound distrustful but is this just a bed out of the elements?

Nancy

 

[toughlovin]

It is not a detox center... it is a sober house for the down and out. i really have no idea how much they monitor him... according to difficult child he hasn't used in a week (no one believes that) and it is only spice that he is showing positive for so I dont think he needs detox. And yes he can walk out of there and in fact has to be out of the house from 10-3 during the day... so they are going to push him to look for a job. This place for the down and out was on his original list of 3.... and I was told that its where they send those who have no money. So it is a holding place really. My hope is that it won't be too pleasant and he will be happy to get to the nicer place. But if he keeps using he wont get out of there either...and then i guess we would have to refuse to pay for it. So to some extent yeah it is a bed out of the elements....

 

[Nancy]

Gotcha. The shelters here either provide at least one meal a day or tell them where to go for feed the poor centers. I suppose there are not many open on the weekend though.

I think of detox as getting the drugs out of your body though, so in a sense he does need detox. He may not have physical withdrawal symptoms but his body needs to be detoxed from the drug. If he used spice over a week ago it should be out of his system for sure by now. I don't want to give you anything else to worry about but I would think that if this is just a holding cell he may not stay clean. The other thing that worries me in all honesty is that if he is not addicted to a high why does he keep going back to it in the face of all these serious consequences. I would think his body is craving drugs, craving the high. Therefore when he doesn;t get them he has some physical reaction which causes him to use.

I wish he could be someplace that made sure he did no drugs by watching him 24/7 and providing food so that he does not leave. It may be unrealistic to expect him to stay away from drugs on his own, he hasn't been able to do it yet.

Nancy

 

[Nancy]

TL,

you may want to read some information on spice from google. I found this:

Stopping the intake of spice after a period of consistent spice usage invokes unpleasant side effects. Withdrawal symptoms from cessation of spice abuse involve:


Internal unrest, agitation and anxiety
Trembling extremities
Tremor
Heart palpitations
Panic attacks
Headache
Nausea
Vomiting
Feelings of depression
Hopelessness and desperation

Physical withdrawal from spice addiction is an uncomfortable process and is best pursued within a professional care facility where the spice addict can be medically monitored. Spice withdrawal symptoms can be draining and exhausting, especially if co-occurring substance abuse issues are present. Inpatient drug treatment centers ensure that staffed clinicians watch the detoxifying patient to see that he or she is progressing in the spice detoxification process appropriately. After a physical detoxification from spice is behind the client, he or she can engage in an emotional detoxification from the drug as well.

Spice Addiction

I'm just saying he may be having a tough time staying away from it or getting clean enough to get into the other place.

Nancy

 

[toughlovin]

You may be right about all of this...although he did get and stay clean when he was on the beach for a week....and he seemed to feel he would be clean in a week ( although of course i cant trust what he says)....

All i know is there is nothing i can do about it except to wait and see.

I do think he has some real emotional /psychological issues that are at the core of his relapses. I am not saying there are not physical cravings but i dont think that is the main issue for him. I think he cant face his pain and uses drugs to avoid it.....but i also am very aware that i really dont know the full story because he does not let me in very much at all.

All i can do this week is hope for the best. He is getting drug tested where he is at and they will test him for spice.

I think his attraction to spice has been his belief that it wont show up on drug tests. That fact has now changed.

TL

 

[toughlovin]

The other thing is that difficult child was saying yesterday that he didnt need detox....which doesnt mean he doesnt but as an adult he isnt going to get it if he doesnt want it. He is in an area where there are lots of resources if he will use them.

 

[rejectedmom]

fingers crossed. -RM

 

[exhausted]

TL hoping with all my heart difficult child stays clean so he can go to the other place. Hope he is able to do this on his own. Hoping that he wants to get help and this will be the place he finially gets real and does the work to be sober. Always thinking of you and your strength.