difficult child 1 has come up with a "behavior plan".... Hmmmm

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by TeDo, Oct 6, 2011.

  1. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    difficult child 1 was having a particularly hard day the other day and banished himself to his room "for the rest of the day" because he couldn't seem to stop misbehaving so he went this extreme (it was only 11am). I gave him some time alone and then went up to ask him what WE could come up with to help him. He came up with a plan that just might work but with his literal thinking, I need to plug "loopholes" before I'd ever consider implementing it. I gotta give him a lot of credit!!!

    1) Make a card that says STOP and laminate it for me to hold up when he is arguing with me or being "mouthy". If he doesn't stop, he will get a time out that will increase the more he continues after the card is up.

    2) Earn "points" or credits for all the good things he does and situations he handles appropriately. These credits can be used for various rewards depending on how many he gets/saves.

    3) Keep a notebook and write down any of the "bad" things he does for us to discuss later (a day or 2). We could discuss better ways to handle the situations that caused the "bad" behaviors.

    Okay. Sounds good, right? Well, difficult child 1 is not one to generalize from one situation to the next and "in the heat of the moment" forgets the "better ways" we talked about, usually putting us back at square 1. He also doesn't (usually) like to talk about the "bad" stuff when "it's done and over so drop it".

    Does anyone have any brilliant ideas to plug the "loopholes", especially those of you with kids that struggle with the Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) thought process struggles? No, that doesn't mean I don't want input from those of you that don't have kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD) because you guys usually have great ideas too.
  2. keista

    keista New Member

    Have you identified the loophole to him and asked him how to plug it?

    Before you ask him, think of a recent situation you can talk over, so if he starts to protest and say he will talk about things, you can bring up that situation and see if he really is ready to start talking.
  3. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    Ask HIM to plug the loopholes.

    Point out to him that XXX on the plan is the way things "should" work, but that has not been happening, so you need to include "how to handle THAT" in the plan, too. You might be surprised at what he comes up with.
  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Tedo...go into general archives and look up a thread called "rules for teens". I am sure it will give you many things to help you. It is pages and pages long.