difficult child 1 is sending my anxiety in to overdrive!!!

Californiablonde

Well-Known Member
My ex picked the WRONG weekend to cancel on me! I am super stressed out. Work has been crazy and it's that time of the month for difficult child 1 and she is damn near impossible to deal with! First of all this morning she gets up and immediately doubles over in pain due to strong menstrual cramps. She starts crying and saying that her back and stomach hurt so bad that she can barely stand. I told her I would give her some midol and she would probably be feeling better within 30 minutes. difficult child, in her overly dramatic teenage fashion, claims she is hurting so bad that she is unable to walk to the car. She inists that the pain is so bad that no amount of medication will help. Normally I would insist she take the pills and suck it up, but I was already late for work and didn't want to continue arguing. I agreed to let her stay at home.

Normally I do my grocery shopping on Friday nights, so by this point in the week we are almost completely out of food. Both difficult children eat lunch at school. The only food we have in the house right now is a loaf of bread and some hot pockets in the freezer. I remind difficult child of this. She is not too fond of hot pockets, but I tell her that if she really wants to stay home, hot pockets and toast are her only options at this point. She says that's fine and convinces me to let her stay home. At around 11:30 she texts me and asks me to bring her some food on my lunch break. I remind her that my license is still suspended, and I am not allowed to drive anywhere but work and back, and I am absolutely NOT allowed to drive on my lunch breaks. She tells me to risk it and drive anyway. I remind her that getting caught is an automatic ten days in jail here in CA and there's no way in hell I'm going to risk it. I remind her of our conversation earlier this morning, when I told her she would need to make do with hot pockets if I were to allow her to stay home.

She then tells me that she has been repeatedly texting my mom asking her if she will come by and get her something to eat. My mom told difficult child she is too busy today and does not have the time to get her something to eat. I tell difficult child she is going to have to wait until I get home and there's nothing more she can do about it. I tell her to stop texting me at work. I'm busy and I can no longer continue to argue with her. Then she calls me. As soon as I answer the phone she starts crying and saying that she is dying of starvation. I tell her if she's really that hungry, then she'll eat the hot pockets. She tells me she hates hot pockets so much that eating them makes her taste buds hurt. I tell her to deal with it and to leave me alone. Before she can say anything further, I hang up on her.

Now she is blowing up my phone with text after text. She texts me to come give her f**king food now and she says she doesn't care if I get upset at her for cussing. She is begging me to call my mom and ask her once again to bring her food. At this point right now I'm sitting here at work, trying to keep calm, and ignoring her texts. She is really stressing me out. I now have to look forward to coming home later today and hearing her tirade about how nobody loves her and I['m a horrible mother who doesn't care if her very own daughter is starving to death. difficult child isn't the easiest kid to deal with as it is, but when she is on her period she is damn near impossible to be around. I totally would have loved to have been able to ship her off to her dad's this weekend. Since that won't be happening, I just have to suck it up and deal with it. Hopefully both difficult children sleep early tonight and I can have a couple hours of peace at least. Please pray that I do. I just wanna be left alone.....argh!!!
 

TiredSoul

Warrior Mom since 2007
That does not sound fun - at all! Can you hide in your room? That's what I'm doing. I hope you get some peace!
 

Californiablonde

Well-Known Member
No hiding in the bedroom for me. We only have a one bedroom apartment. difficult child 1 and I share the bedroom and difficult child 2 gets the living room. difficult child 1 is ready for bed now so it's time to turn off the bedroom TV. I am letting difficult child 2 watch his shows in the living room. I am so damn tired after this long week of work that I think I'll turn in and go to bed with difficult child 1. At least she's quiet and I can sleep in peace, IF I can sleep tonight. I've been having insomnia real bad lately.
 

buddy

New Member
A little late responding but I hope you are ok! How did it go once you got home to you starving difficult child? ( I should be more sympathetic to her but I live that too. Once q is hungry it is a one track mind. No diverting him and he can get nasty until he eats )
 

Californiablonde

Well-Known Member
Once I got home I handed the food I had picked up straight to difficult child and headed for the bath tub. I was not in the mood to argue with her. Once she had eaten her food she did not say another word about it. I was grateful. She even fell asleep early so I got a couple of hours to myself since both her and difficult child 2 were exhausted from the school week. Turns out her pain wasn't menstrual related after all. She pulled something in her back and she has been in a lot of pain since Friday. Today at work the school nurse called me and said she was in her office and laying down. The nurse tried ice packs to help ease the pain but difficult child said that it only made it worse. The nurse asked me what I wanted her to do and I told her to send difficult child back to class. My mom is making an appointment to take her to the chiropractor later today. Hopefully he can fix whatever the problem is. difficult child really is in a lot of pain and I feel bad for her. I have scoliosis and I frequently get lower back pain so I know how uncomfortable it can be. Hopefully the pain goes away quickly
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
And I'm "sure" she just "loves" PE class and joins every team going... right? <bad joke>

Seriously... if she IS athletic, then this next comment does NOT apply... but if she isn't... has she ever been evaluated by an Occupational Therapist (OT) for motor skills issues? Even at a subtle level, they make classical kid exercise a total pain, and can cause kids to NOT participate in the very activities that build core body strength. And core body strength is a key factor in reducing or eliminating back pain.
 

TiredSoul

Warrior Mom since 2007
And I'm "sure" she just "loves" PE class and joins every team going... right? <bad joke>

Seriously... if she IS athletic, then this next comment does NOT apply... but if she isn't... has she ever been evaluated by an Occupational Therapist (OT) for motor skills issues? Even at a subtle level, they make classical kid exercise a total pain, and can cause kids to NOT participate in the very activities that build core body strength. And core body strength is a key factor in reducing or eliminating back pain.

This is interesting. My difficult child has tested fine for gross motor skills and has some difficulties with some fine motor (hand writing), but I have wondered if there is more going on too. He is very stiff when he walks and gets shin splints whenever he has to run. He also doesn't do well on the sit and reach test in PE. I mentioned it to his pediatrician and she suggested possible ankylosing spondylitis for which we have a referral to a specialist. IC, do you know what specifically an Occupational Therapist (OT) would test for in what you have described above? Tia!
 

InsaneCdn

Well-Known Member
Oh boy. There's a whole raft of things that cause motor skills issues - and around here, other than sensory processing disorder (SPD), an Occupational Therapist (OT) doesn't give a diagnosis. But they do a raft of testing - a whole range of tests. Our Occupational Therapist (OT) took something like 4 hours, and that was just motor skills (included some sensory, but not a full suite of tests on that front - that would have taken another 2-3 hours).

However... if you want to do some interesting reading, check out www.canchild.ca, and specifically look for Developmental Coordination Disorder. Given that half the kids with an ADHD diagnosis also have Developmental Coordination Disorder (DCD)... the chances are fairly high.

Not unusual for Developmental Coordination Disorder (DCD) to look like other stuff.
 
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