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difficult child and boyfriend con easy child son for last time
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<blockquote data-quote="janebrain" data-source="post: 205500" data-attributes="member: 3208"><p>Hi Guys,</p><p>thanks for the support, as always! The checks were for amounts under $100.00. C just wants to never have anything to do with the boyfriend again. In further developments though, he and R feel difficult child is a victim and are trying to rescue her. I don't know if their plan actually went through but the last I talked to C they thought they had convinced her to leave the boyfriend and come live with them. They have lots of conditions--boyfriend does not know where R's apt. is and they planned to confiscate difficult child's cell phone and not allow her a key to the apt. C said that difficult child is feeling very intimidated by boyfriend and is afraid of him. </p><p></p><p>I warned him emphatically that I thought it very likely that difficult child will try to get in contact with boyfriend and will want to go back to him. I told him that she probably feels like boyfriend is the only one who cares about her and understands her, etc. and that she feels she cannot live without him. I told him I hoped I was wrong and he said "you've been right about everything so far, Mom."</p><p></p><p>I think C needs to give it a try in order to feel like he did his best to save his sister and I understand that. In fact, I felt very bad and sad last night for telling him I thought he should just cut her loose. He pointed out she is about to have a baby and he can't just abandon her. </p><p></p><p>So, we'll see how things play out. I do plan to tell him he should take her to a women's shelter if he does have to kick her out. I remember reading some literature to difficult child about emotional abuse about a year ago and she agreed that she could recognize boyfriend in what I was reading to her but it didn't make any difference.</p><p></p><p>I am proud of C for being the nice young man he is. He was never the type to defend his sister when they were growing up--in fact, he joined in when his friends gave her a hard time. He didn't seem protective of her at all and found her very annoying. Now, when it counts, he is trying to help her. I know it will probably not work out but I am proud of him for trying--as long as he knows when it is time to stop and I think he will. I am so sorry he got into this mess, that is what makes me feel the worst. Well, that and the poor baby.</p><p></p><p>I'll let you know what happens as I find out....</p><p></p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="janebrain, post: 205500, member: 3208"] Hi Guys, thanks for the support, as always! The checks were for amounts under $100.00. C just wants to never have anything to do with the boyfriend again. In further developments though, he and R feel difficult child is a victim and are trying to rescue her. I don't know if their plan actually went through but the last I talked to C they thought they had convinced her to leave the boyfriend and come live with them. They have lots of conditions--boyfriend does not know where R's apt. is and they planned to confiscate difficult child's cell phone and not allow her a key to the apt. C said that difficult child is feeling very intimidated by boyfriend and is afraid of him. I warned him emphatically that I thought it very likely that difficult child will try to get in contact with boyfriend and will want to go back to him. I told him that she probably feels like boyfriend is the only one who cares about her and understands her, etc. and that she feels she cannot live without him. I told him I hoped I was wrong and he said "you've been right about everything so far, Mom." I think C needs to give it a try in order to feel like he did his best to save his sister and I understand that. In fact, I felt very bad and sad last night for telling him I thought he should just cut her loose. He pointed out she is about to have a baby and he can't just abandon her. So, we'll see how things play out. I do plan to tell him he should take her to a women's shelter if he does have to kick her out. I remember reading some literature to difficult child about emotional abuse about a year ago and she agreed that she could recognize boyfriend in what I was reading to her but it didn't make any difference. I am proud of C for being the nice young man he is. He was never the type to defend his sister when they were growing up--in fact, he joined in when his friends gave her a hard time. He didn't seem protective of her at all and found her very annoying. Now, when it counts, he is trying to help her. I know it will probably not work out but I am proud of him for trying--as long as he knows when it is time to stop and I think he will. I am so sorry he got into this mess, that is what makes me feel the worst. Well, that and the poor baby. I'll let you know what happens as I find out.... Jane [/QUOTE]
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