I'm not really sure how to handle this. easy child just turned 14. difficult child is 17 and living on his own for the last 7 months. Well, couch surfing and mooching really, but he hasn't been here. He hasn't made much effort to stay in contact with us during that entire time. He will call if he wants or needs something. Did not acknowledge my birthday or Easter but did text easy child on her birthday. Before he went off his medications he would at least be somewhat decent to me and even have lunch with me once in a while (probably because I was paying for medications). After I refused to hand over ADHD medications to him he got mad at me. He was already off his antidepressant before that, I believe. That was mid-March. Since then he refuses to answer my texts and phone calls most of the time and when he does answer he is pretty hostile. He has only gotten in touch once and that was to ask for his birth certificate. So, he is pretty hostile towards me, hasn't spoken to husband in months but is now trying to keep in touch with easy child. He has contacted her on FB 3 x in the last week. Coincides with him trying to get Social services (which he didn't qualify for) and asking me for his Birth Certificate. The contact has been pretty mundane and superficial but it scares the **** out of me. He has made the effort to contact her 3x but she has only responded once, since then she has ignored him. easy child will be attending the same high school as difficult child next year and I'm trying to get the high school to force him into a work program so he is working 4 days a week and only at school for one day. Part of this is for difficult child so he can graduate (because he rarely goes to class even though he is at the school all day) and part of it is so he is away from the school and not around easy child. I have such fear around this. 1) difficult child and easy child were incredibly close as kids. They fought, yes, but they really loved each other, played well most of the time and easy child was always good to him despite that he loved to torment her - in an ADHD sibling kind of way. 2) Part of me still wants them to have a great relationship but I do NOT want difficult child to have any negative influence over easy child. 3) easy child has a good head on her shoulders, is mad at difficult child for what he's done, but still loves him although I'm not sure if she wants a relationship with him right now. 4) Last year I caught difficult child with incestuous porn on his laptop (teen brother and sister stuff). This scared the daylights out of me as it was clear that he actively searched it out, among all the other possible things he could have looked for. We put a lock on easy child's bedroom door (and ours) but didn't tell her about the porn. I did question her to make sure nothing had happened but didn't tell her why in case it was just a stupid teenage boy thing. He had stolen from easy child and us so the locks made sense for that reason. 5) To my knowledge difficult child smokes and drinks. I told easy child that I was concerned about the contact difficult child had made with her and that I didn't want him to be a negative influence on her and suck her in to his way of thinking. I also told her that I know she's a smart girl and makes good choices and I certainly don't put her in the same light as difficult child. I'm so scared that difficult child's lifestyle of carefree partying and living off the kindness of others will look good to easy child on those days where things are tough. She has quite a few Learning Disability (LD)'s and school can be a struggle for her. I just don't know why difficult child is contacting her. He made no effort when he was out of the house last year for 2 months, basically ignored her while he put us through hell last summer and fall and then made no contact with her from November until last week - with the exception of a text on her birthday. It almost seems like he's trying to hurt me through her now. If he can turn her against me that would be the ultimate betrayal of me and proof to him that I'm a horrible parent. I just don't know what to do. I check easy child's facebook and I randomly check her phone. I don't want to put easy child in the middle of what's happening between difficult child and us but I also don't feel like I should allow this relationship to go unmonitored. She hates talking about him because it is upsetting and I don't blame her. So much of the last two years has revolved around him and dealing with his behaviour that we are all sick of it.