Now that life has calmed down a bit, I've been mulling over the events of the year. I went back tonight and looked at old posts, bookmarked some links (I've lost all of my bookmarks twice this year...and you ladies find the best info) and was looking back at our difficult child's. A lot of our kiddos have come a long way. When we are caught up in the demands of the here and now it's easy to lose sight of the progress that has been made. I know things were bad with difficult child, but I've been so caught up in everything else in life that how far difficult child has come was a startling revelation. Less than a year ago, I was actively pursuing therapeutic day school for difficult child. She was melting down and raging on a daily basis - at minimum. I had given notice at my job because the demands of difficult child had long since outpaced the demands of my job. I was planning on doing in-home daycare (out of the question now due to my need for employer provided health insurance). I was actively researching every possible avenue of treatment...making phone calls, asking for info to local resources, more phone calls. I had forgotten how absolutely desperate I was to find something - anything - to help difficult child because *noone* seemed to have any answers. Noone seemed to know what to do. And now, well, difficult child isn't a walk in the park and I'm sure she never will be, but she is not the same kid I was posting about 9 months ago. Not even close. Way to go, difficult child. It wasn't an overnight change, but it was close. It makes me wonder how much of difficult child's spiraling was due to my failing health and the resulting anxiety for her, how much was due to my inability to parent her the way she needs, and how much is due to the fact that I'm home now (instead of working) which provides difficult child with a lot of emotional security. I do know that even if the above are reasons - and I'm sure they play a big role, at least - I have seen a lot of maturity in difficult child; a lot of growing. I'm proud of my darling girl. She's come a long way, baby.