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difficult child has Reactive Attachment Disorder?
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<blockquote data-quote="Stella" data-source="post: 257015" data-attributes="member: 6837"><p>Thanks all for your replies.</p><p> </p><p>Smallworld/MWM- no, I'm not in the US, I am in Ireland. The only place I have ever heard mention of a neuropsychologist before is on this board but I do intend to go down that path eventually and try and get a an evaluation.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em>Sadly, of all the diagnosis'es they've thrown at my difficult child, while I can't see HOW he can really be Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), his symptoms and behavior fit it. Nothing else he's diagnosis'ed with truly fits.</em></p><p> </p><p>Shari, this is exactly how I feel at the moment. I am not fully convinced difficult child is on the spectrum. A lot of her behaviours seem to be directed at me. She doesn't trust me, she doesn't let me hug her or touch her, she sometimes screams at me "I wish granny was my mom" or " I want a new mom" and she never shoes any remorse for anything she says or breaks!!! I feel rejected by her, no matter how hard I try I can't seem to get through to her and it's heartbreaking. I read somewhere before that Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids see love as a sign of weakness - how can i win???? </p><p> </p><p>Despite all that, there are moments, for example, Sunday just gone, was Mother's Day here in Ireland. I woke up to difficult child bringing me breakfast in bed. She made some toast and used a scissors to cut out the toast in the shape of a heart <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> She also had also bought me a huge card and a pair of pink fluffy slippers. Although I was delighted she did this, it didn't stop her tantrums throughout the day and she had such a rage last night that she threw my ipod on the ground and smashed it. I find myself questioning whether the card and the toast etc were to make me happy or just because it was Mothers Day and this is what she's MEANT to do. I really don't like that I am questioning the motives behind anything good she does....</p><p> </p><p>Terry - thanks for that link, I read that article. I found it very interesting and it does offer a bit of hope which is nice and some articles I have read on Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) are truly terrifying and the prognosis is NOT good.</p><p>It does say "<em>Attachment disruptions and disorders often have similar symptoms of disorders such as ADHD or autism and may be misdiagnosed" </em></p><p>How are we ever meant to truly know if we have the right diagnosis???</p><p> </p><p>Susiestar - difficult child DOES have sensory problems. So if she does have a diagnosis of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) - she is Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) with sensory issues!! Thanks for the advice about not starting any intenstive therapy until I know for sure. I have read somewhere that therapy for Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) will be much more likely to work before the age of 12. If she does have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) -this means i have one CRUCIAL year to get things back on track. I don't want to rush into though in case like you said... it may be the wrong diagnosis!!!</p><p> </p><p><em>Take some time and just BREATHE. Let yourself relax. Do something nice for yourself - you EARNED it listening to that diagnosis and researching it and wondering about it. It is a very scary diagnosis to face.</em></p><p> </p><p>Thank you for that, I have to admit that i am TERRIFIED by what i have read on Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and am torturing myself with fears that difficult child is going to grow up to be a sociopath and do something awful. Sometimes I think too much knowledge is a dangerous thing. </p><p> </p><p>In saying that, a poster on here before said "prepare for the worst but hope for the best" and I suppose that's what i am trying to do by educating myself on the possibilties.</p><p> </p><p>Thanks again.</p><p></p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p><em> </em></p><p><em></em></p><p><em></em></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Stella, post: 257015, member: 6837"] Thanks all for your replies. Smallworld/MWM- no, I'm not in the US, I am in Ireland. The only place I have ever heard mention of a neuropsychologist before is on this board but I do intend to go down that path eventually and try and get a an evaluation. [I][/I] [I]Sadly, of all the diagnosis'es they've thrown at my difficult child, while I can't see HOW he can really be Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), his symptoms and behavior fit it. Nothing else he's diagnosis'ed with truly fits.[/I] Shari, this is exactly how I feel at the moment. I am not fully convinced difficult child is on the spectrum. A lot of her behaviours seem to be directed at me. She doesn't trust me, she doesn't let me hug her or touch her, she sometimes screams at me "I wish granny was my mom" or " I want a new mom" and she never shoes any remorse for anything she says or breaks!!! I feel rejected by her, no matter how hard I try I can't seem to get through to her and it's heartbreaking. I read somewhere before that Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids see love as a sign of weakness - how can i win???? Despite all that, there are moments, for example, Sunday just gone, was Mother's Day here in Ireland. I woke up to difficult child bringing me breakfast in bed. She made some toast and used a scissors to cut out the toast in the shape of a heart :-) She also had also bought me a huge card and a pair of pink fluffy slippers. Although I was delighted she did this, it didn't stop her tantrums throughout the day and she had such a rage last night that she threw my ipod on the ground and smashed it. I find myself questioning whether the card and the toast etc were to make me happy or just because it was Mothers Day and this is what she's MEANT to do. I really don't like that I am questioning the motives behind anything good she does.... Terry - thanks for that link, I read that article. I found it very interesting and it does offer a bit of hope which is nice and some articles I have read on Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) are truly terrifying and the prognosis is NOT good. It does say "[I]Attachment disruptions and disorders often have similar symptoms of disorders such as ADHD or autism and may be misdiagnosed" [/I] How are we ever meant to truly know if we have the right diagnosis??? Susiestar - difficult child DOES have sensory problems. So if she does have a diagnosis of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) - she is Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) with sensory issues!! Thanks for the advice about not starting any intenstive therapy until I know for sure. I have read somewhere that therapy for Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) will be much more likely to work before the age of 12. If she does have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) -this means i have one CRUCIAL year to get things back on track. I don't want to rush into though in case like you said... it may be the wrong diagnosis!!! [I]Take some time and just BREATHE. Let yourself relax. Do something nice for yourself - you EARNED it listening to that diagnosis and researching it and wondering about it. It is a very scary diagnosis to face.[/I] Thank you for that, I have to admit that i am TERRIFIED by what i have read on Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and am torturing myself with fears that difficult child is going to grow up to be a sociopath and do something awful. Sometimes I think too much knowledge is a dangerous thing. In saying that, a poster on here before said "prepare for the worst but hope for the best" and I suppose that's what i am trying to do by educating myself on the possibilties. Thanks again. [I] [/I] [/QUOTE]
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