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difficult child is back
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<blockquote data-quote="Ca Mom Losing Hope" data-source="post: 671761" data-attributes="member: 17782"><p>Yes, boundaries are tough for both sides. Our DCs have never had them and we really find it difficult to set them and hold to them. Last year I started setting strong boundaries with Difficult Child but I think I could do better with DCs older brother. I am going to work on that. He has the 30 day notice and it is time he spreads his wings and doesn't come back, at least not to live here. He has a job, he can do it. I keep telling myself, part of why I am in this situation is because I didn't project to them that they could do it, they are capable of taking care of themselves. The older one knows he is, but I still see fear. My Difficult Child is doing better with the medication. He even told me "I am not incompetent" when we were talking about him going down to social services and getting his medical permanent. Those were good words to hear. The next call was when he went off and told me to never call him again, but we had good calls before that.</p><p></p><p>So we told DCs brother last night, that Difficult Child is not allowed on the property. I told him this very clearly over the last week. I told him he needs more time and so do I. I also told him we can't have anyone around the baby that is doing drugs. He says he isn't but I said, only time will tell if you continue to be clean. </p><p></p><p>I am actually happy his brother is helping him. Everyone needs someone to help them. If you read my first post, it is all about how his brother went off on him, beating him in his sleep even, in Indiana. So he knows what his brother is capable of. We will see what happens next. </p><p></p><p>I know one thing, I am not sitting around waiting for it to happen.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Ca Mom Losing Hope, post: 671761, member: 17782"] Yes, boundaries are tough for both sides. Our DCs have never had them and we really find it difficult to set them and hold to them. Last year I started setting strong boundaries with Difficult Child but I think I could do better with DCs older brother. I am going to work on that. He has the 30 day notice and it is time he spreads his wings and doesn't come back, at least not to live here. He has a job, he can do it. I keep telling myself, part of why I am in this situation is because I didn't project to them that they could do it, they are capable of taking care of themselves. The older one knows he is, but I still see fear. My Difficult Child is doing better with the medication. He even told me "I am not incompetent" when we were talking about him going down to social services and getting his medical permanent. Those were good words to hear. The next call was when he went off and told me to never call him again, but we had good calls before that. So we told DCs brother last night, that Difficult Child is not allowed on the property. I told him this very clearly over the last week. I told him he needs more time and so do I. I also told him we can't have anyone around the baby that is doing drugs. He says he isn't but I said, only time will tell if you continue to be clean. I am actually happy his brother is helping him. Everyone needs someone to help them. If you read my first post, it is all about how his brother went off on him, beating him in his sleep even, in Indiana. So he knows what his brother is capable of. We will see what happens next. I know one thing, I am not sitting around waiting for it to happen. [/QUOTE]
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