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Substance Abuse
difficult child is headed down again
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<blockquote data-quote="exhausted" data-source="post: 528234" data-attributes="member: 11001"><p>Liahona-so glad to see you are still around. I think we should meet for lunch-school will be out soon and I will have time. Thank you for your support.</p><p></p><p>Signora-thank you, I am doing my best.</p><p></p><p>DDD-Yes, I have been around awhile and I have read many books for drug and sex addiction, Borderline (BPD) and ADHD and probably QRST as well. Never stops the hurt. I am struggling with detatchment-I freely addmit it. But I have made baby strides. I did not cut off these friendships with much older people (I would have been very involved just a few month ago), I have not snooped her facebook for a long time, I have not offered advise unless she asked, I have not given her money, I refuse to transport her any place she can get herself, I walk away or silently listen when she gets into her circular conversation mood, I have given up on forcing treatment, I have not hired a lawyer for upcoming court, I go to choir each week no matter her condition, I attend FA no matter her condition. I talk to and go with my friends at least a few time a month.</p><p></p><p>I struggle with guilt. This is way common in families that deal with Borderline (BPD). I am saying gratitude prayers every day. I am praising myself for the good parenting I have done. I am looking for positives in myself and my life, and I am working on forgiveness (of myself and others). I believe guilt goes away when one finially believes they did the best they could with what they knew at the time. I'm not there yet. My self-esteem is not very healthy right now either-too many critical people and I am too reflective at times.</p><p></p><p>When a crisis happens, as yesterday-things are tough and they regress for me. I needed to post those events and feelings for me-so I could go on. I am greatful for my easy child. He is a great kid and I am blessed to have him. He loves us very much and we are so proud of his insight and maturity. I am glad he shared with me because part of what he was saying is that he wants his mom back and he needs his parents too-even as an adult. </p><p></p><p>I am glad I can post here and glad for the support. I am glad when I know I am not alone and others are struggling with detatchment and enabling and..... just as I am.<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/emoticons/beautifulthing.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":beautifulthing:" title="beautiful thing :beautifulthing:" data-shortname=":beautifulthing:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="exhausted, post: 528234, member: 11001"] Liahona-so glad to see you are still around. I think we should meet for lunch-school will be out soon and I will have time. Thank you for your support. Signora-thank you, I am doing my best. DDD-Yes, I have been around awhile and I have read many books for drug and sex addiction, Borderline (BPD) and ADHD and probably QRST as well. Never stops the hurt. I am struggling with detatchment-I freely addmit it. But I have made baby strides. I did not cut off these friendships with much older people (I would have been very involved just a few month ago), I have not snooped her facebook for a long time, I have not offered advise unless she asked, I have not given her money, I refuse to transport her any place she can get herself, I walk away or silently listen when she gets into her circular conversation mood, I have given up on forcing treatment, I have not hired a lawyer for upcoming court, I go to choir each week no matter her condition, I attend FA no matter her condition. I talk to and go with my friends at least a few time a month. I struggle with guilt. This is way common in families that deal with Borderline (BPD). I am saying gratitude prayers every day. I am praising myself for the good parenting I have done. I am looking for positives in myself and my life, and I am working on forgiveness (of myself and others). I believe guilt goes away when one finially believes they did the best they could with what they knew at the time. I'm not there yet. My self-esteem is not very healthy right now either-too many critical people and I am too reflective at times. When a crisis happens, as yesterday-things are tough and they regress for me. I needed to post those events and feelings for me-so I could go on. I am greatful for my easy child. He is a great kid and I am blessed to have him. He loves us very much and we are so proud of his insight and maturity. I am glad he shared with me because part of what he was saying is that he wants his mom back and he needs his parents too-even as an adult. I am glad I can post here and glad for the support. I am glad when I know I am not alone and others are struggling with detatchment and enabling and..... just as I am.:beautifulthing: [/QUOTE]
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