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Substance Abuse
difficult child is missing---update found!
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<blockquote data-quote="exhausted" data-source="post: 546478" data-attributes="member: 11001"><p>Dear Nancy-I am sorry I am late on this thread too much going on. I just want to say that worrying is normal and it is what mom brains were designed to do. That you have worked hard on detatching with love. You are double worried because your difficult child is so immature and has mental issues as well. We do not stop the worry and the hopes just because we stop other enabling behaviors. Everything comes in stages. Your difficult child is just out doing what she wants-it isn't directed at you or even that she doesn't care. Her brain is wacked for all the reasons that AG said. Narcosism is so great a part of the disease and it is also something that can characterize mental issues.</p><p></p><p>I am glad you share here. I need to share here as well as I learn in stages to be a better mom to my addict and mentally ill child. Shades of grey are everywhere. Tough love is preached as the best sollution for addicts and yet books I read about Borderline (BPD) say it only backfires and makes things worse.(So where is the answer?) That they are truelly anguished and disabled by their brains makes it hard to dump them out so easily. They try to self-sooth by using, being risky, anything that shuts their "crazzies" off. The answer is blowing in the wind. Noone has an answer and each person and family travels at their own pace. We live in the "mystery" and we live day to day.</p><p></p><p>I hope she is back and working and I pray for her and each" board child" every night. I ask my higher power to bless each mom here. ((Hugs))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="exhausted, post: 546478, member: 11001"] Dear Nancy-I am sorry I am late on this thread too much going on. I just want to say that worrying is normal and it is what mom brains were designed to do. That you have worked hard on detatching with love. You are double worried because your difficult child is so immature and has mental issues as well. We do not stop the worry and the hopes just because we stop other enabling behaviors. Everything comes in stages. Your difficult child is just out doing what she wants-it isn't directed at you or even that she doesn't care. Her brain is wacked for all the reasons that AG said. Narcosism is so great a part of the disease and it is also something that can characterize mental issues. I am glad you share here. I need to share here as well as I learn in stages to be a better mom to my addict and mentally ill child. Shades of grey are everywhere. Tough love is preached as the best sollution for addicts and yet books I read about Borderline (BPD) say it only backfires and makes things worse.(So where is the answer?) That they are truelly anguished and disabled by their brains makes it hard to dump them out so easily. They try to self-sooth by using, being risky, anything that shuts their "crazzies" off. The answer is blowing in the wind. Noone has an answer and each person and family travels at their own pace. We live in the "mystery" and we live day to day. I hope she is back and working and I pray for her and each" board child" every night. I ask my higher power to bless each mom here. ((Hugs)) [/QUOTE]
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