difficult child is not 'engaged' but plans to fly 'out west' to meet a girl he met online.....ugh

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by welcometowitsend, May 16, 2013.

  1. So an update on difficult child. He still seems to be pretty mad at me but at least I got the obligatory "Happy Mothers Day" text on Sunday. That was it though -he never responded to any of my texts. Oh well, I'll take it.

    Apparently he was not fired from his job a couple of months ago. He was given a warning and then given another warning a few weeks ago. He has been calling in sick and giving away his shifts because they are inconvenient for him - ie. he would rather party with his friends. He's been told that if he is late one more time or gives away one more shift he will be fired. This weekend is a long weekend for us. He is scheduled to work Friday, Saturday, Sunday - wonder if he'll make it through without losing his job.

    I called him this morning. He answered the phone and talked to me briefly. Says he's going out west this summer to visit a 'friend'. He told my parents that he's going to Saskatchewan to visit a girlfriend he has met online then to British Columbia with his other friend to visit people there. My mom says "How do you know he isn't some creepy guy on the computer?" difficult child knows. Uh, ok.

    I'm not overly worried about it because he'll never have enough money to make the trip. Hopefully he's not stupid enough to hitchhike - his friend is flying. Oh, and difficult child doesn't have a birth certificate so I'm not sure how he's going to prove his identity (to fly) because his passport is about to expire in June and I'm not renewing it for him. Guess he'll be out of luck.

    I hope this trip doesn't work out for him. The thought of him ending up on the other side of the country and possibly not coming back scares the daylights out of me. Vancouver, like Toronto (which we are near) has a huge drug problem and homeless teen problem. At least if he is here I can kind of keep an eye on him without enabling him.

    Hopefully his buddy's mother doesn't 'lend' him the money. I hope she's not that stupid. He's already a month behind on his $25 a week room and board because of his work issues.

    What is it with difficult child's and relationships lately? Ugh!
  2. dashcat

    dashcat Member

    I feel your pain. Ugh! Like your son, my daughter "knows" these people she meets online. She believes that they have actual relationshps. I can only imagine how upsetting it is to think of him going so far away.
  3. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh WTW, more 'stuff' for Mom to think about............geez.............I also hope this trip does not pan out for him.........generally their attention span is so short, perhaps in a week or so this will all be forgotten..........I understand how you feel, I'm sorry, I wish he would get it together, however it may be a longer ride for you..........take care of YOU. .........HUGS..........
  4. Tiredof33

    Tiredof33 Active Member

    That's true, even a week is a long time for them. My difficult child also says he can correctly 'sum' a person up as soon as he meets them. I think he can with another difficult child lol!!
  5. I have a feeling this 'relationship' has been going on for a while. I snooped his FB page via my easy child's FB (he has blocked me) and about 6 weeks ago I saw a video about 2 teens that have had a successful longterm relationship - met online and eventually met in person. He commented on it "gives me hope."
    He likes to join those websites where the girls offer to send you nude photos and have online sex with you. Ugh. That's probably how he met her. Some of those sites are for teens too, I guess.

    Guess I'll just wait and see what happens. If he gets fired from his job he won't be going out there unless he decides to hitchhike or something. And even then what will he eat? That's another thing - I don't think he's eating much - not sure if he's trying to lose weight, uncomfortable eating food from his friends place or what. I haven't seen him in a while but my mom said his clothes were baggy and I saw a picture of him on FB and his face looked thinner. He has some wiggle room because he was 5'10 or 11" and was 175lb in March. When I married husband he was 6' and 130lb. So I'm not going to get too worried about that either.