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difficult child is truly evil....
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 627458" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>This situation stinks. If nothing else, difficult child parties, doesn't he? How many calls to the police that he has drugs on the premises will it take to irritate the living heck out of your son? I bet that even calling from your home iwth reports that son is threatening your father, himself, etc..., that he is using/selling drugs from the building, etc... will get him some attention. </p><p></p><p>I URGE your father to seek legal advice because what the cops tell you is OFTEN not the whole truth or the only option. Esp given the way difficult child can be violent. It may be that a restraining order could get him out as could pressing charges for vandalism of other apartments, trespass for going into other apartments (with or with-o tenants in them), etc.... </p><p></p><p>A good lawyer should be able to find SOME way to help.</p><p></p><p>You didn't create this, cannot stop it, and are NOT TO BLAME for it. Your dad could have said no, or put rules/lease/etc.. in place to prevent some of the problems. Of course he didn't think he should have to, but he had to know your difficult child was troubled and a behavior problem by this point. Your dad isn't to blame either, of course. But given his history as a cop, he had to have some insight into the possibilities that could happen. Sadly, family can give us blinders.</p><p></p><p>I hope that you find a way to cope through this. PLEASE let this be the ast thing. Let this be the 'discontinuation criteria' for your relationship with difficult child, the one thing that is 'bad enough' for you to say "I am NOT your whipping girl, target, ATM, self help book, investor, rescuer and general buffer between the FULL ramifications of your choices to hurt people for the sheer joy of it." I am so sorry it had to come to this, but I don't think his disdain of common decency and his family can be much clearer. </p><p></p><p>I am so very, deeply and truly sorry for your pain and your father's pain.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 627458, member: 1233"] This situation stinks. If nothing else, difficult child parties, doesn't he? How many calls to the police that he has drugs on the premises will it take to irritate the living heck out of your son? I bet that even calling from your home iwth reports that son is threatening your father, himself, etc..., that he is using/selling drugs from the building, etc... will get him some attention. I URGE your father to seek legal advice because what the cops tell you is OFTEN not the whole truth or the only option. Esp given the way difficult child can be violent. It may be that a restraining order could get him out as could pressing charges for vandalism of other apartments, trespass for going into other apartments (with or with-o tenants in them), etc.... A good lawyer should be able to find SOME way to help. You didn't create this, cannot stop it, and are NOT TO BLAME for it. Your dad could have said no, or put rules/lease/etc.. in place to prevent some of the problems. Of course he didn't think he should have to, but he had to know your difficult child was troubled and a behavior problem by this point. Your dad isn't to blame either, of course. But given his history as a cop, he had to have some insight into the possibilities that could happen. Sadly, family can give us blinders. I hope that you find a way to cope through this. PLEASE let this be the ast thing. Let this be the 'discontinuation criteria' for your relationship with difficult child, the one thing that is 'bad enough' for you to say "I am NOT your whipping girl, target, ATM, self help book, investor, rescuer and general buffer between the FULL ramifications of your choices to hurt people for the sheer joy of it." I am so sorry it had to come to this, but I don't think his disdain of common decency and his family can be much clearer. I am so very, deeply and truly sorry for your pain and your father's pain. [/QUOTE]
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