difficult child lost her job and wants us to "lend" her money . . .

[Bean]

This is a timely, helpful thread. I can see so much of my daughter in this. It's hard not to fall for the sob stories, and to not feel like you're not fulfilling your role as a parent sometimes, when you deny them "support" for the things they ask for. But, as one of the above posters said, when you look at it as a way of helping them get on their feet, and take responsibility for their actions, it helps.

 

[Nomad]

Kathy...
Please refresh my memory....like myself and Nancy, isn't your difficult child adopted?

Good for your husband for blocking her number. by the way, husband and I went to a Families Anonymous MTg. a few times and thought they were excellent. 99% of the parents there were dealing with adult children who were substance abusers and many seem to also have issues with either personality or mood disorders.

Since our adult child (knock on wood and crossing myself) does not/did not have a substance abuse issue, we don't always get a lot out of the topics. HOWEVER, we noticed that the parents had excellent comraderie. Some have been going to these meetings for decades...even after the situation had passed. They formed lifelong friends. SOME even go on Christmas Day. If a mtg. falls on Christmas Day it is NOT cancelled. They are not cancelled no matter what! I laughed when I heard that and said "I understand."

When you start reading that book...PLEASE POST and fill us in and what you think. Okay? Many thanks.

Hang in there and (hugs).

 

[Kathy813]

No, Nomad, my difficult child is not adopted. I looked for a Families Anonymous meeting a while ago and couldn't find any in my area. There are several Al-Anon and Nar-anon and I have even found some NAMI support groups at the same mental health clinic where difficult child goes. I haven't decided which one would be the best fit.

She called husband today to gleefully tell him that the p-doctor at the clinic had prescribed all of the same drugs that we had told the nurse she was abusing and selling. I guess our input didn't make any difference.