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General Parenting
difficult child refuses to do anything we say, sneaks out, etc
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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 105856" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>I agree. At that age, you still control the house,the car, the phones, and his clothing. That gives you a lot of leverage.</p><p>Natural consquences work well. That hard part is staying cool and walking away to let him have his meltdown by himself.</p><p>Since the good behavior allowance worked to a point, I would revisit that and tweak it.</p><p>Also, is he leaving the house at 2 a.m.? or in the middle of the afternoon? You should be able to negotiate his leaving after he does some chores. In the beginning they can be fairly simple--a load of wash, getting junk off of his bedroom floor--things that won't take all day and emotonally overwhelm him.</p><p></p><p>You may want to just tackle one behavior at a time so it doesn't become overwhelming for all of you.</p><p></p><p>The hard part is finding something good, when you are at your wits end. Like "Thank you for giving me that message," or "Thankyou for holding open that door," "You did a nice job negotiating that corner where the semi didnt' see you."</p><p></p><p>Good luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 105856, member: 3419"] I agree. At that age, you still control the house,the car, the phones, and his clothing. That gives you a lot of leverage. Natural consquences work well. That hard part is staying cool and walking away to let him have his meltdown by himself. Since the good behavior allowance worked to a point, I would revisit that and tweak it. Also, is he leaving the house at 2 a.m.? or in the middle of the afternoon? You should be able to negotiate his leaving after he does some chores. In the beginning they can be fairly simple--a load of wash, getting junk off of his bedroom floor--things that won't take all day and emotonally overwhelm him. You may want to just tackle one behavior at a time so it doesn't become overwhelming for all of you. The hard part is finding something good, when you are at your wits end. Like "Thank you for giving me that message," or "Thankyou for holding open that door," "You did a nice job negotiating that corner where the semi didnt' see you." Good luck. [/QUOTE]
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difficult child refuses to do anything we say, sneaks out, etc
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