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General Parenting
difficult child repeated beligerent name calling to parents
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 380372" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Hi Carolyn. I think you've got great insight into how your son's mind works - he creates drama/chaos and basks in the result. That's his reinforcement right there. I know it's really hard to ignore this kind of constant garbage - it just wears you down - but every time you react, it's fuel to his fire.</p><p></p><p>I'd expect him to increase his attempts to engage you. It will probably get worse before it gets better. If you have to, buy ear plugs (not kidding). My diversion of choice is my MP3 player when the teen/tween around here start crossing the line. I've also been known to go on strike - it's very effective with- my younger 2 kids. I am *not* their servant, I deserve respect, and they know the fastest way to get me to shut down is to cop an attitude. </p><p></p><p>You are required to provide food, shelter, bedding, and clothes (of your choice). Period. Do you think he might change his tune if you start removing the good stuff? Does he respond to positive/negative reinforcement?</p><p></p><p>Have you talked to his counselor about this? That might be a good resource for you, even if he won't go right now. Do you think offering a carrot (reward) might get him back into the therapist?</p><p></p><p>Our kids really know how to cut us to the core - easy child or difficult child. We have to develop really thick skin and selective hearing loss some days. </p><p></p><p>"Boy"... Oh my goodness, LOL. I just don't know where they come up with- this stuff sometimes.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 380372, member: 8"] Hi Carolyn. I think you've got great insight into how your son's mind works - he creates drama/chaos and basks in the result. That's his reinforcement right there. I know it's really hard to ignore this kind of constant garbage - it just wears you down - but every time you react, it's fuel to his fire. I'd expect him to increase his attempts to engage you. It will probably get worse before it gets better. If you have to, buy ear plugs (not kidding). My diversion of choice is my MP3 player when the teen/tween around here start crossing the line. I've also been known to go on strike - it's very effective with- my younger 2 kids. I am *not* their servant, I deserve respect, and they know the fastest way to get me to shut down is to cop an attitude. You are required to provide food, shelter, bedding, and clothes (of your choice). Period. Do you think he might change his tune if you start removing the good stuff? Does he respond to positive/negative reinforcement? Have you talked to his counselor about this? That might be a good resource for you, even if he won't go right now. Do you think offering a carrot (reward) might get him back into the therapist? Our kids really know how to cut us to the core - easy child or difficult child. We have to develop really thick skin and selective hearing loss some days. "Boy"... Oh my goodness, LOL. I just don't know where they come up with- this stuff sometimes. Hang in there! [/QUOTE]
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difficult child repeated beligerent name calling to parents
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