difficult child The New Generation

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Hound dog, Feb 2, 2008.

  1. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    You know when Mom's say they're cursing you with a child just like you are, so that when you're a parent you'll finally be able to understand what they went thru?

    Well, I know I used to tease both my difficult child's about it.

    I think the "curse" stuck on Nichole. (of course Travis hasn't had his first girlfriend yet lol)

    Aubrey is a carbon copy of her mother in appearance and in personality. It's like having Nichole as a toddler again. This is both good and bad. lol While Aubrey can be the most sweet loving child, in a split second she can go into a rage that can be physically damaging to anyone close enough. She bites, she hits, she pinches (and I mean PINCHES), kicks, and head butts.

    I'd like to chalk it up to temper tantrums. But these rages also occur when we haven't a clue as to what she's raging about.

    But I've had plenty of experience with rages and know how to deal with them. I'm currently teaching Nichole and boyfriend. Still, last week she scared the life out of both of them by unfastening her seatbelt of her car seat and getting out of it while they were speeding down the highway. I can only chuckle as Travis was doing that by 9 months. So told them techniques to keep her safely strapped in.

    What I'm wondering about is her speech. We don't baby her. She is expected to talk. Just the way we are with toddlers. It's the way I did my kids, and my kids as parents are the same way with theirs. So this isn't laziness on parent's part or spoiling.

    Aubrey can say some words. Every once in a blue moon she'll pop out with a complete complicated sentence that will knock your socks off. But for the most part, she doesn't talk. She is still babbling. Actually, she is just now realling into babbling. And I think going to daycare triggered it.

    The child is 21 months old. At 21 months old my kids were talking, you could understand them. (for the most part) This INCLUDES Travis who had some serious speech problems and speech delays. Grandson Darrin was talking better than Aubrey is now at 12 months. (yes, he was way ahead of his peers)

    I know each child is different. I know this. And I'm trying hard not to find problems. But I've watched this child from birth be seriously delayed in every single childhood milestone. Except for walking, her delays rivaled Travis', and his were considered serious by the neruologist who was furious no one had paid attention.

    Aubrey is very bright. I've no doubt about that. If she sees you do something (anything) she can do it right away. So much so it often gets her into trouble. She was picking up sign language quickly. But I stopped because I was worried she'd never talk. And although we haven't used the signs we taught her in months she still will use them.

    At 22 months I usually potty train (or start) little girls. I let them go at their own pace. But I don't see this happening with a toddler who doesn't have words to tell us when she needs to go to the potty.

    I'm hoping daycare will help drive her to WANT to talk. But she's had the desire for a long time. I think some of her rages are coming out of frustration because she doesn't have the words to tell us what she wants or needs. And at this point I'll be happy with just simple one word requests. But she's only been in daycare for a month. They've also noticed the lag in her speech. (so it isn't just me)

    Even if I can get Nichole to mention it to pediatrician doctor, he blows her off. He's blown me off when I went with her over the other delays. And to me, this is just too many delays to ignore. Maybe there isn't anything wrong and she's just doing it all at her own speed, or maybe there is something wrong and she's not getting therapy to help her get on target because it's being ignored.

    Frustrating. Reminds me too much of what I went thru with docs over Travis.

    We don't ask for the world, we'd just like her evaled to be sure. Doesn't sound so unreasonable to me. Especially when there are known problems in the family.

    I already mentioned the rages, the developmental delays, oh and there are plenty of Sensory Integration Disorder (SID) issues too ( i did say she's her mother's copy), and now there are issues at the daycare. She's been there little more than 3 wks. She's been put into time out for hitting multiple times. Biting once.

    Yep, sound like a lil difficult child to me. But what do I know? I only raised two of them myself. Ugh.
  2. Marcie Mac

    Marcie Mac Just Plain Ole Tired

    Lisa, Wyatt has problems with his expressive speech, although his receptive speech is excellent. I saw him today and he is speaking a little clearer (he will be 4 in June) but not as clear as it should be. I asked the eldest if she is ever going to take him in for his speech, and she said he was fine - his preschool teacher is from Boston, and he has picked up her speech patterns :rolleyes:To me his speech sounded like one would sound talking when they have a hearing problem.

    But, what do I know.. I would have your gd tested - the earlier the better..

  3. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Lisa...as you know the girls seem to be just about on the same track with many things. Now Keyana doesnt have the rages (at least here with us but we have been told that she does bite her big brother when he takes her toys!) however her talking is really lagging behind. She understands everything we say.

    She is also babbling constantly and its like she is having long drawn out conversations with you but you only understand a quarter of the words...lol. She isnt using two word sentences yet that we can understand. She seems to be trying but she isnt there yet. She tries to get her needs across and will say things like "here" and hand us something or call out...Daddy, Come here! That is her longest sentence...lol. I think she hears us use it so much.

    She also is one that can see us do something once or twice and never forgets it. Thankfully she isnt a carseat houdini.

    I think we got incredibly lucky in that she seems to have a really laid back personality because she is smart...you can see it in the way she sits and processes things...but she is content to listen and take directions much better than any of my boys ever did.
  4. Lothlorien

    Lothlorien Active Member Staff Member

    the heck with the doctor then. Have Nichole write a letter to the board of ed to request evaluation. Get her into early intervention while you can. She will definitely qualify for speech therapy, from what you are saying, if not Occupational Therapist (OT) and some other things. Your school district may have a pre-school program to get her into, which would be a great alternative to putting her into daycare.