A
AmericanGirl
Guest
difficult child came to go to dentist. He had previously let me know that he didn't know if he had time to come by cause he wanted to see friends. I let him know not to come just to get cash.
He was nice. Short visit and he went to dentist. He returned. Has appointment for cleaning plus two cavities...just assumes I am paying.
He was going to take shower. I asked if he would mow grass first. He didn't (a) have clothes (there's a closet full of clothes), (b) want to have the sun on him, (c) want to because I didn't ask him ahead of time...you get the drift. He told me to hire someone. I told him I would and they would get the cash I knew he was expecting from me.
He took shower and then we talked again. More resistance. I reminded him his rent was due today. I didn't offer a check. He left - asking my pets to pray for him as he did. I asked why. "Because they may kick me out and I don't know where I will go." I didn't reply.
Called Sober House manager. Told him I would mail him check but I simply couldn't hand it to difficult child under those circumstances. He said I did the right thing. He is going to go ask difficult child for the cash. difficult child is going to get a free trip to see what two homeless shelters look like. Manager understands I will pay if he asks me to do so - but thankfully, he is willing to push difficult child.
It seems difficult child is back on restrictions because he missed morning meditation. He also hasn't cleared it with his new job to be off on Sun/Wed nights when the sober house has mandatory meetings. Manager said difficult child is manipulative and self-centered. Yup. I offered to pay for additional coaching which is a service they offer. He said that wasn't needed right now. I just want to know I have tried everything.
One bright spot....difficult child and his roommate won the cleanest apartment award. $10 gift cards each. difficult child brought his back to the manager and said he didn't clean so he doesn't deserve it.
My al-anon sponsor told me that I would most likely be the last one to see improved behavior from difficult child. He's probably right.
Here's my request. I'm going Monday for six month CT scans...post-cancer follow up. I'm scared. If you would remember me in your prayers/thoughts I would be most grateful.
He was nice. Short visit and he went to dentist. He returned. Has appointment for cleaning plus two cavities...just assumes I am paying.
He was going to take shower. I asked if he would mow grass first. He didn't (a) have clothes (there's a closet full of clothes), (b) want to have the sun on him, (c) want to because I didn't ask him ahead of time...you get the drift. He told me to hire someone. I told him I would and they would get the cash I knew he was expecting from me.
He took shower and then we talked again. More resistance. I reminded him his rent was due today. I didn't offer a check. He left - asking my pets to pray for him as he did. I asked why. "Because they may kick me out and I don't know where I will go." I didn't reply.
Called Sober House manager. Told him I would mail him check but I simply couldn't hand it to difficult child under those circumstances. He said I did the right thing. He is going to go ask difficult child for the cash. difficult child is going to get a free trip to see what two homeless shelters look like. Manager understands I will pay if he asks me to do so - but thankfully, he is willing to push difficult child.
It seems difficult child is back on restrictions because he missed morning meditation. He also hasn't cleared it with his new job to be off on Sun/Wed nights when the sober house has mandatory meetings. Manager said difficult child is manipulative and self-centered. Yup. I offered to pay for additional coaching which is a service they offer. He said that wasn't needed right now. I just want to know I have tried everything.
One bright spot....difficult child and his roommate won the cleanest apartment award. $10 gift cards each. difficult child brought his back to the manager and said he didn't clean so he doesn't deserve it.
My al-anon sponsor told me that I would most likely be the last one to see improved behavior from difficult child. He's probably right.
Here's my request. I'm going Monday for six month CT scans...post-cancer follow up. I'm scared. If you would remember me in your prayers/thoughts I would be most grateful.