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General Parenting
difficult child won't go to school...need advice ASAP
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 114163" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Truthfully I don't see the point in physically dragging him (even</p><p>if it is possible) to the school. That will up the ante and it</p><p>surely is not a solution that difficult children would remember with fear and trepidation. As a easy child I tried that once with my Mother and much</p><p>to my complete surprise my Dad (not the disciplinarian or even the participant in the unpleasant side of family rearing) came</p><p>into my room and said "DDD you are going to school. Get yourself</p><p>dressed and ready in ten minutes. In ten minutes I will come back to your room and take you to school...even if you choose to</p><p>stay in your pajamas. Do you understand?" I cried and cried as</p><p>I got dressed for school. BUT I was a major easy child. Even that method</p><p>would not work with a difficult child because they would then decide to strip</p><p>to their BVDs and prove they were the boss.</p><p></p><p>Quietly analyze what difficult child values most in his life. Quietly figure</p><p>out what you can remove as a consequence for this power stand.</p><p>Does he LOVE his bike? easy child 2? Cartoons? Best friend? </p><p></p><p>Life is made up of "cause and effect" "choices and consequences".</p><p>We all have to do things in order to move forward. If you don't</p><p>go to the grocery store = the family will not eat well. If Daddy</p><p>doesn't go to work = the electricity might not stay on to keep</p><p>you warm. etc. etc. Children have to go to school because (1) it</p><p>is the law; (2) humans have to learn or they are the same as cats</p><p>etc. etc. </p><p></p><p>Think about your approach, confer with your husband and then DO IT!!</p><p>Do what??? I don't know. DO what you and your husband agree is the</p><p>right thing to do so you are a united front and little difficult child does</p><p>not get the impression that he is in charge. He isn't. He will</p><p>not be. He can not be. Once he finishes school he can get his</p><p>own place and be totally in charge. NOW..your home, your rules.</p><p>LOL! DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 114163, member: 35"] Truthfully I don't see the point in physically dragging him (even if it is possible) to the school. That will up the ante and it surely is not a solution that difficult children would remember with fear and trepidation. As a easy child I tried that once with my Mother and much to my complete surprise my Dad (not the disciplinarian or even the participant in the unpleasant side of family rearing) came into my room and said "DDD you are going to school. Get yourself dressed and ready in ten minutes. In ten minutes I will come back to your room and take you to school...even if you choose to stay in your pajamas. Do you understand?" I cried and cried as I got dressed for school. BUT I was a major easy child. Even that method would not work with a difficult child because they would then decide to strip to their BVDs and prove they were the boss. Quietly analyze what difficult child values most in his life. Quietly figure out what you can remove as a consequence for this power stand. Does he LOVE his bike? easy child 2? Cartoons? Best friend? Life is made up of "cause and effect" "choices and consequences". We all have to do things in order to move forward. If you don't go to the grocery store = the family will not eat well. If Daddy doesn't go to work = the electricity might not stay on to keep you warm. etc. etc. Children have to go to school because (1) it is the law; (2) humans have to learn or they are the same as cats etc. etc. Think about your approach, confer with your husband and then DO IT!! Do what??? I don't know. DO what you and your husband agree is the right thing to do so you are a united front and little difficult child does not get the impression that he is in charge. He isn't. He will not be. He can not be. Once he finishes school he can get his own place and be totally in charge. NOW..your home, your rules. LOL! DDD [/QUOTE]
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difficult child won't go to school...need advice ASAP
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