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Parent Emeritus
difficult children, curfews, boundaries ...help!
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<blockquote data-quote="dashcat" data-source="post: 529898" data-attributes="member: 9175"><p>My 20 year old difficult child recently moved back home with me. It has been going fairly well but, well - she's a difficult child. She went out last night with a friend from work (female) to a movie and then back to her house. She got in around 3:00 and I didn't question it because she texted me to tell me that she was going to the friend's and when she'd be home.</p><p></p><p>Tonight, same friend picked her up after work to attend a party at a local campus. She said she'd text me with an idea of when she'd be home. She did text to say she'd arrived at the party, but then ended up texting her at 2:00 with "status?" She replied "still at party". I then texted "ETA?" (usual codo for estmated time of arrival). No response. I called and left a message. She called back, sounding trashed. Didn't know what ETA meant, stumbled, said she'd be home in a "few hours". I pressed and she said she'd be home by 9:00 a.m. (we have somewhere to go in the morning.</p><p></p><p>She hasn't lived with me - except for a very brief period - since high school. She had a curfew then of midnight on weekends, 10:00 weekdays that weren't school days. </p><p></p><p>I can't have her staying out all night, yet I didn't want to press it tonight as I wasn't sure of the condition of her driver.</p><p></p><p>Do you have curfews for your "adult" difficult children? If this was an isolated incident,I wouldn't be concerened, but my difficult child's patternis to take a mile when given an inch. I don't want her doing overinghts on a regular basis - can't think that anything good will come out of that. Thoughts?</p><p></p><p>Dash</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dashcat, post: 529898, member: 9175"] My 20 year old difficult child recently moved back home with me. It has been going fairly well but, well - she's a difficult child. She went out last night with a friend from work (female) to a movie and then back to her house. She got in around 3:00 and I didn't question it because she texted me to tell me that she was going to the friend's and when she'd be home. Tonight, same friend picked her up after work to attend a party at a local campus. She said she'd text me with an idea of when she'd be home. She did text to say she'd arrived at the party, but then ended up texting her at 2:00 with "status?" She replied "still at party". I then texted "ETA?" (usual codo for estmated time of arrival). No response. I called and left a message. She called back, sounding trashed. Didn't know what ETA meant, stumbled, said she'd be home in a "few hours". I pressed and she said she'd be home by 9:00 a.m. (we have somewhere to go in the morning. She hasn't lived with me - except for a very brief period - since high school. She had a curfew then of midnight on weekends, 10:00 weekdays that weren't school days. I can't have her staying out all night, yet I didn't want to press it tonight as I wasn't sure of the condition of her driver. Do you have curfews for your "adult" difficult children? If this was an isolated incident,I wouldn't be concerened, but my difficult child's patternis to take a mile when given an inch. I don't want her doing overinghts on a regular basis - can't think that anything good will come out of that. Thoughts? Dash [/QUOTE]
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