Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
difficult child's new principal called me at work and now I'm freaking out.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Tiapet" data-source="post: 614011" data-attributes="member: 455"><p>CA, I'm going to go along with those who suggest you get an advocate. Seriously! You need one. You will not be able to do this on you own I believe. You have enough to contend with and this is to the point where you need someone who knows the law very well. The principal over stepped his/her bounds very very much, this I can assure you! First in bringing in the fact of where and what you do for a leaving and using it as leverage. Second in questioning your daughter's stomach ulcers. It can and does happen and actually is happening quite a bit of recent times. Between kids getting bullied, stressing over the new rules of testing (if you lived where I lived you would hear horror stories of kids going to ER with heart issues!) and then just the mental illness issues that can wreck havoc. WAY OUT OF LINE! </p><p></p><p>I understand that you have fledgling wings of a warrior mom and a lot on your plate. I think we all understand that and that's precisely why you need an advocate! You won't have to pay for it and you will still be involved but they can certainly help carry this burden in a more effective way and help you through what's going to get difficult. I don't mean to scare you (not that you aren't already).</p><p></p><p>My son spent almost the last half of last year trying desperately to not go to school. He is 15 now (14 then) and was only in middle school but he weighed almost 180 pounds! There was no physical way I could make him go! NO WAY! His worker is very involved with us. Here is what took place:</p><p></p><p>I contacted the school and let them know of the issues. In his case there were teacher issues happening (1 regular ed and then his SPED teacher who is only consultative, meaning he only sees her to talk to her and check in). It seemed like they were really out to get him but at best they just didn't get him and were actually hampering every effort we (as a team) were trying to accomplish in trying to keep him in the school. He hated that school, the kids bullied him, the principal is a jerk as is the female vice principal. They even treated me horribly (there is long story on past incidents). I found an allie in the male vice principal as did mr busy. This vp "got" my son. He could work with him and he worked with me and any time there was a problem he was the ONLY one I would talk to and told my son to go to. Anyway, I was told to call the local sheriff to have them <em>make</em> him go to school. Big joke! They do NOT do that! It was up to me to make him go and that wasn't happening. Only ace I had with that is mr busy hadn't yet figured out they <em>wouldn't</em> come out so there was a lot of threatening happening and I'd tell him I was going to call. His worker is an ex parole officer too so he told him point blank what would happen to him from the point he got in front of a judge, how his life would end up being even MORE accountable to me AND the court if we had to go that route. I can tell you that it was a huge struggle and he was ~motions with fingers~ this close to me having to go to court for the amount of days he had out. I begged, pleaded, bribed, threatened. Somehow I managed to get him there. </p><p></p><p>If it wasn't for the fact that I could get him transferred into the school he's currently in for his freshman year, we'd be right back to where we were last year with the local high school as it's no better then the middle school! (ms emo goes to the highschool he would have gone to).</p><p></p><p>My point was that it was a struggle, I had to enlist help. I got and advocate to help fight the school and explain the issues. Not once or twice. 3 times! I've had to get an advocate again this year for ms emo to because she has mega issues and 1 is physical issues like your daughter. Get the proof! Before they even ask for it. Arm yourself as best as you can. As everyone mentions, it can and WILL be part of the IEP. There are MANY things they can work with in the IEP. I learned that for ms emo (yes I'm switching children here now as it fits situation) could have modified classes or schedules (days) if she needed due to health once proven, if further necessary there are even more things that could be done like online schooling, tutoring at home, etc. Your advocate from YOUR area will know what is or isn't available to your daughter as well as the law for your state/county/school district and they will be the BEST help for you to fight the school.</p><p></p><p>Keep a record, written record of what that principal said to you as well. In the past I've actually written back to someone who's done that to have it in writing. Something to the effect of...</p><p></p><p>"Dear Mr. Principal, </p><p></p><p>As per our telephone conversation on (date) when you mentioned that I worked in attendance at another school and should be aware of how "your daughter's name" absences affects her per school policy. I just wanted to reiterate to you that I am very well aware of this and have been faithfully attempting to abide by the school policies with her but due to her mental health and "physical ailment name here", which I am happy to provide to the school from the doctor, it is not always feasible for her to make it to school or to school on time. We do try. Further more, I am requesting that we convene an IEP meeting to address these needs at which time myself and my advocate and the school staff may be able to come up with adequate accomodations/modifications to meet her needs.</p><p></p><p>Thank you,</p><p></p><p>Sincerely,</p><p>your name</p><p></p><p></p><p>Be kind to yourself. Know that you ARE doing all that you can. Right now you just need an extra helping hand with her (the advocate) to look at the situation and put it into perspective and come up with some alternative plan before they can come after you. The advocate will also help keep the school in check from over stepping their bounds on you too. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tiapet, post: 614011, member: 455"] CA, I'm going to go along with those who suggest you get an advocate. Seriously! You need one. You will not be able to do this on you own I believe. You have enough to contend with and this is to the point where you need someone who knows the law very well. The principal over stepped his/her bounds very very much, this I can assure you! First in bringing in the fact of where and what you do for a leaving and using it as leverage. Second in questioning your daughter's stomach ulcers. It can and does happen and actually is happening quite a bit of recent times. Between kids getting bullied, stressing over the new rules of testing (if you lived where I lived you would hear horror stories of kids going to ER with heart issues!) and then just the mental illness issues that can wreck havoc. WAY OUT OF LINE! I understand that you have fledgling wings of a warrior mom and a lot on your plate. I think we all understand that and that's precisely why you need an advocate! You won't have to pay for it and you will still be involved but they can certainly help carry this burden in a more effective way and help you through what's going to get difficult. I don't mean to scare you (not that you aren't already). My son spent almost the last half of last year trying desperately to not go to school. He is 15 now (14 then) and was only in middle school but he weighed almost 180 pounds! There was no physical way I could make him go! NO WAY! His worker is very involved with us. Here is what took place: I contacted the school and let them know of the issues. In his case there were teacher issues happening (1 regular ed and then his SPED teacher who is only consultative, meaning he only sees her to talk to her and check in). It seemed like they were really out to get him but at best they just didn't get him and were actually hampering every effort we (as a team) were trying to accomplish in trying to keep him in the school. He hated that school, the kids bullied him, the principal is a jerk as is the female vice principal. They even treated me horribly (there is long story on past incidents). I found an allie in the male vice principal as did mr busy. This vp "got" my son. He could work with him and he worked with me and any time there was a problem he was the ONLY one I would talk to and told my son to go to. Anyway, I was told to call the local sheriff to have them [I]make[/I] him go to school. Big joke! They do NOT do that! It was up to me to make him go and that wasn't happening. Only ace I had with that is mr busy hadn't yet figured out they [I]wouldn't[/I] come out so there was a lot of threatening happening and I'd tell him I was going to call. His worker is an ex parole officer too so he told him point blank what would happen to him from the point he got in front of a judge, how his life would end up being even MORE accountable to me AND the court if we had to go that route. I can tell you that it was a huge struggle and he was ~motions with fingers~ this close to me having to go to court for the amount of days he had out. I begged, pleaded, bribed, threatened. Somehow I managed to get him there. If it wasn't for the fact that I could get him transferred into the school he's currently in for his freshman year, we'd be right back to where we were last year with the local high school as it's no better then the middle school! (ms emo goes to the highschool he would have gone to). My point was that it was a struggle, I had to enlist help. I got and advocate to help fight the school and explain the issues. Not once or twice. 3 times! I've had to get an advocate again this year for ms emo to because she has mega issues and 1 is physical issues like your daughter. Get the proof! Before they even ask for it. Arm yourself as best as you can. As everyone mentions, it can and WILL be part of the IEP. There are MANY things they can work with in the IEP. I learned that for ms emo (yes I'm switching children here now as it fits situation) could have modified classes or schedules (days) if she needed due to health once proven, if further necessary there are even more things that could be done like online schooling, tutoring at home, etc. Your advocate from YOUR area will know what is or isn't available to your daughter as well as the law for your state/county/school district and they will be the BEST help for you to fight the school. Keep a record, written record of what that principal said to you as well. In the past I've actually written back to someone who's done that to have it in writing. Something to the effect of... "Dear Mr. Principal, As per our telephone conversation on (date) when you mentioned that I worked in attendance at another school and should be aware of how "your daughter's name" absences affects her per school policy. I just wanted to reiterate to you that I am very well aware of this and have been faithfully attempting to abide by the school policies with her but due to her mental health and "physical ailment name here", which I am happy to provide to the school from the doctor, it is not always feasible for her to make it to school or to school on time. We do try. Further more, I am requesting that we convene an IEP meeting to address these needs at which time myself and my advocate and the school staff may be able to come up with adequate accomodations/modifications to meet her needs. Thank you, Sincerely, your name Be kind to yourself. Know that you ARE doing all that you can. Right now you just need an extra helping hand with her (the advocate) to look at the situation and put it into perspective and come up with some alternative plan before they can come after you. The advocate will also help keep the school in check from over stepping their bounds on you too. ;) [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
difficult child's new principal called me at work and now I'm freaking out.
Top