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difficult child's request
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 630338" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Echo, more progress. This is great. More progress. You did that hard work, you changed and stuck to your change (awesome!!!) and he has changed. This is our fondest hope...it's happening here. I am so glad. </p><p></p><p>So now, the ball is back in your court with him wanting to live at home. </p><p></p><p>I would think, for now, a halfway house is a much better place for him to be, for now. They have rules, drug tests, have to have a job, have to start paying your own way, doing chores around the house, curfews, etc. </p><p></p><p>If you like this idea, you could offer to pay for the first week (two weeks, whatever?) then a sliding scale for two more weeks or longer, while he gets some money ahead. He needs to get a full time job anyway---to stay busy and start taking care of himself more and more.</p><p></p><p>Go slow, Echo. I would not let him back into my home right now. I think he may backslide---his steps are so new and so tentative----and after all, relapse is part of it----and you don't need him there anyway.</p><p></p><p>He's 21, time to move forward, and moving back home isn't forward. </p><p></p><p>Your home is your sanctuary. You need that, Echo, with all you are dealing with.</p><p></p><p>You could start seeing difficult child more regularly, maybe, for lunch or dinner once a week. Take it slow. </p><p></p><p>Slow is good. Warm hugs! For just a minute, let's pause and be so grateful for this positive step for difficult child, before we dive back in.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 630338, member: 17542"] Echo, more progress. This is great. More progress. You did that hard work, you changed and stuck to your change (awesome!!!) and he has changed. This is our fondest hope...it's happening here. I am so glad. So now, the ball is back in your court with him wanting to live at home. I would think, for now, a halfway house is a much better place for him to be, for now. They have rules, drug tests, have to have a job, have to start paying your own way, doing chores around the house, curfews, etc. If you like this idea, you could offer to pay for the first week (two weeks, whatever?) then a sliding scale for two more weeks or longer, while he gets some money ahead. He needs to get a full time job anyway---to stay busy and start taking care of himself more and more. Go slow, Echo. I would not let him back into my home right now. I think he may backslide---his steps are so new and so tentative----and after all, relapse is part of it----and you don't need him there anyway. He's 21, time to move forward, and moving back home isn't forward. Your home is your sanctuary. You need that, Echo, with all you are dealing with. You could start seeing difficult child more regularly, maybe, for lunch or dinner once a week. Take it slow. Slow is good. Warm hugs! For just a minute, let's pause and be so grateful for this positive step for difficult child, before we dive back in. [/QUOTE]
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