difficult child's therapist Appointment

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Bunny, Nov 18, 2012.

  1. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Yesterday morning difficult child had an appointment with the therapist. This is the first appointment that we've had since the hurricane hit. The office is right on the water (therapist is on the second floor) and he was telling me yesterday that there was 4 feet of water in the first floor offices of the building. This is also the first appointment since difficult child punched a hole in easy child's door. It started out something like this:

    therapist: So, how are things going?
    difficult child: Fine. Everything's good (at which point I make a face)
    therapist: Mom, you disagree?
    Me: (Speaking directly yo difficult child) You don't think there is anything that needs to be talked about?
    difficult child: No.
    Me: Like your brother's bedroom door? (you can tell by the look in his face right now that he knows where I'm going with this)
    difficult child: No!
    Me: And the fact that there is now a hole in it?
    therapist: Something tells me that the hole was not made by a mouse, either.
    difficult child: Why are you bringing this up? That was SO long ago and it's OVER!

    therapist and I then start talking about the psychiatrist appointment and after we got through that I left the room. therapist is really good because he starts talking to difficult child about other things that put difficult child at ease, and then he comes back around to, "What happened to your brother's bedroom door?" Much to my surprise, he admitted everything he did that day. Locking easy child and me out of the house, trying to beat the heck out of me, going after easy child, putting the hole in the door. All of it! I was stunned when the therapist told me that. difficult child also told him that he gave me the money that the got for his confirmation to pay for the new door.

    therapist told me at the end of the appointment that difficult child feels very guilty about it, which is fine, but he was also trying to get difficult child to understand that guilt is his brain's way of telling him that he did something wrong and this is one of those times when your actually need to examine what you did and LEARN from it. We are also trying to get him to understand that he can tell the therapist anything. There is very little that he can tell the therapist that would make the therapist change his opinion of him. The therapist's office is a "safe room" and anything that he does, good or bad, can be talked about there because that is where he is going to get help when he falls down.
  2. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Sounds like a really good therapist. I always find it amazing that q tells all too. I guess thats a good thing.
    Hope he makes the connection. And I also hope the week goes well for you all.
  3. cubsgirl

    cubsgirl Well-Known Member

    I agree with Buddy that you have a really good therapist. I am so glad that difficult child feels safe sharing with therapist. I hope he continues to progress in a positive manner.
  4. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Sounds like a great appointment! Definitely a keeper of a therapist!